I clearly remember hearing about the shocking murder — a frightening mystery that colored every day and night in Orinda until an arrest was made.
In the meantime, and along with the rest of the town, I watched this whole tale unfold sadly and slowly during the course of several months.
I’d known both girls in a “recognize them and know their names” kind of way — not as friends — but they always seemed just like nice, normal kids. I had known Kirsten since first grade, and had one class with Bernadette at the time of her arrest.
In addition to presenting the story as it was published in November of 1985, I have also added some photos from my own collection, including one from a trip she and I both took to Washington DC with a school group, as well as other pictures from our ’85 class yearbook.
You’ll notice that there are no pictures of Kirsten as a cheerleader. Despite how she’s best known, and though she officially had a place on the squad for the upcoming school year, her life was ended before she ever got to cheer for the MHS team.
They seemed like perfect teenage girls living in the perfect town — until a chilling act of jealousy ended a life and tore a community apart.
The cheerleader murder
by Carol Pogash
A popular and pretty cheerleader, Kirsten Costas, was dead, and sheriff’s deputies were searching for the girl who stabbed her.
The day after the murder in June 1984, rumors had already spread at the tennis courts, down oak-shaded lanes and at poolside. Some claimed it was am an act of Satanism or a PCP-induced killing.
No one wanted to believe that the killer came from Orinda, the lush Northern California suburb where Kirsten lived.
The affluent residents of Orinda cite good schools and a crime-free environment as the main reasons they moved to the town.
Orinda, with a population of about 17,500, lies just thirty-three minutes from downtown San Francisco by Bay Area Rapid Transit. Commuting time shrinks to twenty-five minutes in a BMW, the most popular car at Miramonte High School, where students’ scores are consistently among the highest on California’s state achievement tests.
With a median household income of $60,000, the area’s families are not upwardly mobile — living in Orinda certifies that they have already arrived.
About seventeen years ago, Arthur and Berit Costas moved from Oakland to Orinda seeking a beautiful, safe community with good schools. Attractive and hard-working, they fit easily into their new neighborhood.
The Costases raised two children: Kirsten and her younger brother, Peter. Art became an executive with the 3M Corporation, and Berit stayed home, looking after the kids and the house. The family became active members of the Meadow Swim and Tennis Club, just a stone’s throw from their home.
Although the Costases are quiet, their fifteen-year-old daughter was not. “Kirsten was the energy of the house,” says her mother. “She was always listening to music, making phone calls, dancing. She was full of life. We are simple people. She was raring to go, ready to start to live her life when it was snuffed out.”
Everything about her had flair. “She was cute, not beautiful,” says Sue Morrow, a family friend, “an all-American girl. More like a Sports Illustrated swimsuit model than a Playboy type.”
While she lacked the blond good looks of many of her friends, she had beautiful olive skin, and when she pulled her curly hair brown with golden highlights — back from her forehead, her mother thought Kirsten looked like a Vogue model.
Kirsten, who had just finished her sophomore year at Miramonte, had started to change social circles back in junior high, recalls her good friend Diane MacDonald.
By the time she reached Miramonte, Kirsten was in the clique that counted — “the loud crowd,” some kids called it. Wherever the group went, they were noticed.
“We used to say Kirsten had everything,” says one classmate. “She was skinny. She sometimes wore tie-dyed socks, what people are wearing now.”
Another recalls, “I remember watching her after she made cheerleader. Everyone wanted to be like her.”
In the spring of 1984, Kirsten had been asked to join the Bob-o-links, or Bobbies, an elite sorority-like organization of thirty to thirty-five of the best looking, most popular girls in school. In addition to joining the Bobbies, Kirsten was a member of the varsity swim team.
But most important to Kirsten was becoming a cheerleader. She practiced constantly at home in the family room and sometimes at Diane MacDonald’s house, in front of the windows at night, to see her reflection.
Cheerleading, her friend Jessica Grant explains, “is taken really seriously.” Before trying out, applicants write essays explaining what they could add to the school. Parents sign an agreement to spend $500 to pay for green and white uniforms and cheerleading camp.
Girls are graded by twenty judges, and are told their fate at an Academy Awards-type ceremony where outgoing cheerleaders pluck names from envelopes, giving the winners kisses and flowers.
Kirsten was one of the winners. She was, says one of the judges, “a perfect cheerleader.”
Kirsten was attending cheerleading camp, living in a dorm at St Mary’s College in nearby Moraga, when Berit Costas received a seemingly uneventful call on Thursday, June 21, 1984.
The caller identified herself as a Bobbie, and told Berit she knew Kirsten was away until the weekend, but asked if she would be able to attend an initiation dinner for new Bobbies that Saturday night.
When Berit said yes, the caller replied that someone would pick Kirsten up by car, and that no one else should know of the plans.
That Saturday evening, Kirsten’s parents and brother left to attend a potluck dinner for Peter’s Little League team. When a car honked outside the house on Orchard Road around eight-thirty, Kirsten left the TV on, walked out to a mustard-colored Pinto and got in.
A little over an hour later, an agitated Kirsten rang the bell at a stranger’s door. Alexander and Mary Jane Arnold, who live in Moraga, had been playing cribbage with neighbors. When they opened the door, they saw Kirsten and, behind her, another girl, who looked about fifteen, “lurking out the path.”
Kirsten, who appeared tense but not terrified, said, “My friend got weird on me.” She asked to call home. When no one there answered the phone, Alexander Arnold offered to drive her back to a neighbor’s house in Orinda. As they drove, Kirsten seemed unconcerned when Arnold saw the mustard-colored Pinto tailing them.
When the car pulled up to Kirsten’s neighbor’s house, Kirsten assured Arnold she would be all right. Then she got out.
In the meantime, the girl driving the Pinto had quickly parked and slid out of her own car. As Kirsten walked away from Arnold’s car, the other girl swooped out from behind a tall hedge and ran forward with her arm raised.
Arnold saw a flash from a metal blade about one-and-a-half feet long. Kirsten fell and sprang up again.
Though mortally wounded, she ran to Arthur Hillman’s house across the street for help.
>> Go to page 2 to keep reading
211 Responses
Any more update regarding Bernadette and the family members of both girls?
Homegurl was going to out someone.
Berit and Bob Costas live in Hawaii. It’s unknown what happened to Peter Costas (Kirsten’s younger brother)
Bernadette’s parents also left Orinda, but its unknown if they left the state of California.
Bernadette protti longed to be popular and she decided to kill an innocent person just because she couldn’t have things get way….that’s sad. I just don’t understand can’t people just be happy with what god has made them.
for what i read the cheerleader was mean to bernadette protti,the cheerleader always thought she was prettier than bernadette and didnt want to be her friend.kirsten the cheerleader always hurt her feelings.have you seen the movie with tori spelling?death of the cheerleader.
You know movies aren’t real, don’t ya? Read about the real story instead of talking crap.
I can’t believe they made a movie that was so offensive to the real victim. It sounds like she was only mean one time about her having cheap ski boots. And ironically the real Kirsten was the brunette and the kiler was the blonde. The goth was actually into New Wave music and was not goth people at the school just thought she was weird for dying her hair New Wave because it was such a conservative school. She had a sort of ombre style in fact which was kind of weird in the 80s, but cutting edge. She once told Kirsten to shut up in biology and that’s why everyone thought she’d done it.
What’s she going to say? She dead
No in the documentary where the “new wave girl” was actually interviewed, she ACTUALLY said “I want you dead and to see your blood drip” Her own words in the interview on true crime via Amazon Prime – she said those EXACT words. Doesn’t make her a killer, that’s being a teenager… but don’t make it sound like she just said “shut up” that’s unrealistic.
I agree Disgruntled Donut
Maria
You didn’t read that. No such articles exist about anything you have described. There is no point in making stuff up.
I saw an interview with one of her classmates who described her as mean.
The movie eve swapped their hair colours you can’t take it too seriously although it did iclude certain claims of Beradette’s like that Kirsten commented on Bernadette having cheap ski boots although all she said was that Bernadette made some comment not even what the comment was and that Kirsten’s voice was unexcited when she saw it was Bernadette. The whole movie seems based on stuff Bernadette said and from her point of view which is a bit unfair. . It has her sister cutting vegetables with a ridiculously long knife too, and Kirsten’s parents were right who cuts up vegetables with a knife that long that they keep in the car?
Why couldn’t her sister cut up the vegetables on the counter top where it’s sooo much easier???
Well to a degree maybe, but Bernadette stalked her and longed fro a friendship. I hear Kirsten was Cocky and Arrogant, but not any Bully. She didn’t deserve to die.
Yes, the movie showed Kirstan being extremely mean. However, she did not deserve to die. There have been a couple people in my youth that I thought were extremely mean to me. I didnt kill them. I just didnt bother with them.
What preppy teenaged girl doesn’t think she’s better than the next? Who cares about that, that is no reason to be lured from your own home and murdered by a psycho.
Kristen’s parents are right the story as told doesn’t make any sense. I think Kristen called Bernadette out on being a lesbian. And back then Bernadette was never going to admit that. She felt it was even worse than having killed someone which is ridiculous and sad but there’ve been a few cases like this.. It’s thought to be the reason why Skylar Neese was really killed though her two “best friends” who killed her claimed they just didn’t like her any more (again doesn’t make sense) and there was evidence that Skylar had seen her two friends making out.
Lisa I totally agree. I think she made a pass and got rejected.
I know right. Its sad, but when all is said and done its not worth it
The movie really leaned toward Bernadette being seen by Kirsten and others as less of a person. But I do agree in the movie Bernadette seemed dressed down the night of the murder and if she was really going to a popular party, bringing Kirsten and wanting to be seen as more popular, then she would have been dressed nicer. And in the movie, the big butcher knife sat between the 2 girls in the car. Bernadette, as described would have known that Kirsten would have thought it weird to be driving around with a butcher knife. Pre-meditation seems sensible between the clothes and the knife. The only truly real statement that is completely believable is Bernadette’s taped confession where she is mostly panicked about press and people “knowing”. As any 15 year old would….even today in 2015.
The movie did not do justice to Kirsten’s memory as it seemed to blame the victim rather than the killer. Additionally, the Bernadette character was portrayed as sweet and innocent, while a sexy twenty-something Tori Spelling played the part of the 15 year old Kirsten. Looking at the pictures, it is shocking to see that Kirsten Costas is the face of an innocent little girl. Lifetime should be ashamed. Knowing that the Protti family is no longer poor, I hope they didn’t benefit financially from this film!
I don’t understand why Kirsten Costas was portrayed as a pretty girl or how she even was some one to be jealous of. I’m not saying that she should have been killed, but sometimes bad behavior has a terrible outcome which is why we all need to teach our children to respect the feelings of others.
“Joy”,
I don’t understand why you sympathize with a murderer and perpetuate lies about her murder victim under different aliases.
What bad behaviour? You never give examples of what Kirsten did.
“we all need to teach our children to respect the feelings of others”
So Kirsten should have been perfectly okay with the fact that Bernadette lied to her to get her out of her house alone and then drove her to an empty car-park and appears to have confessed feelings of admiration for her? Do you really think it’s acceptable to lure someone out of their house under false pretences and then expect a positive reaction if your lie is discovered? If Bernadette respected Kirsten’s feelings, she would have left Kirsten alone when she fled Bernadette’s car and wouldn’t have stalked her to her house. As I wrote to you in a previous comment, if anyone was “pushed to the brink”, it was Kirsten, but instead of reacting violently like Bernadette did, she ran from Bernadette’s car. Kirsten is the true victim in this case.
As I also wrote to you in a previous comment, judging from your malicious, reprehensible comments and utter ignorance and delusion, your moral fiber is rotten to the core, and I pity any child subjected to your skewed guidance as their moral fiber will no doubt succumb to decay.
Karen, get a fkn life!
I was wondering why she was so pro-Bernadette. I don’t care what anyone says to another person, it does not give you the right to kill them. And yes, I was bullied in high school too. I was called ugly, to my face by a group of senior boys on my first day. I am 59 years old and I remember it like it was yesterday. I didn’t kill anyone, I went to college, had a successful career, a loving family and am happily retired with my husband who I met right after I graduated college in 1983. So yes it sucks to be bullied, but that is no excuse for any kind of physical action.
How dare you? Kirsten was gorgeous! She reminds me of Stacey Dash a little. For you to even fix your fingers to type a reference that this was some sort of fault of the victim’s speaks volumes about you as a person. Kids can be cruel, it’s always been that way. Bernadette was/is just a mental case. She had an issue, and if what Kirsten’s friends say are right about her and being so bold to ‘outspoken’ maybe she recognized that the girl wasn’t ‘wrapped too tight’ but being young didn’t know the term, hence calling her ‘weird’
The knife was her sister’s for making lunch it was even in the movie that way. The movie hinted at Bernadette being gay but only a hint. “Oh you’re so pretty and popular and amazing” I think that’s what Kirsten meant by her friend “getting weird” Then she killed her rather than have Kirsten tell everyone she was a lesbian. That’s a much more obvious motive.
Doesn’t it seem weird that Bernadette’s sister would have an 18-inch knife for cutting tomatoes? Wouldn’t she have something smaller, like a paring knife?
What if what you and I perceive as not nice clothes were as nice as she opened bc her family wasn’t wealthy? Plenty of facts support that view. That leaves only the knife and whether it’s true or not a witness corroborated the girl’s account. So there actually is no first degree evidence that is solid and beyond a reasonable doubt.
first of all, the judge had to be stupid to find it second degree murder and it doesn’t matter if she didn’t plan to kill kirsten. Bernadette deserved the same sentence as would any get it doesn’t matter even if she was a juvenile at the time she.should have been trialed as an adult. The costas still have to deal with pain and grief and it doesn’t matter if she was angry nobody thought about kirsten or her family by letting bernadette get a slap on the wrist! justice was nwot served and the costas have shed tears and felt grief for over 30 years and i think bernadette shouldn’t have been given the privelege to go to college, get her high school diploma, have a boyfriend, and then have kids and get married no she should have been locked in a brick cell staring at walls all day so that she could focus on what she did but no she is scott free now to go out and kill again if she wants. i don’t want to hear poor bernadette was bullied no she had mental issues. i feel sorry.for any poor sap who has to live in her neighborhood because like the investigator wisehart said she has a hidden trigger that anyone can pull just by not giving her what she thinks she.should get in a relationship. the fact is bullying had nothing to do with it she was a sick and twisted individual and still is!
Nope! Not when she was bullied and pushed to her limit!! Snobs like Kristen who think they are better than everyone, put others down, and degrade them because of their class status are the reason shootings like Columbine took place. I was raised to treat others with respect. Real class comes from decent human beings who have respect for others, and treating others the way that they want to be treated. I don’t believe she deserved to die, but she should have received a serious reality check. Maybe her parents should have raised her better. Sorry but the parents are to blame. My kid knows better than to bully others.
“Rupaul”
Where are the examples of Kirsten bullying Bernadette and pushing her to her limit? As I wrote in another comment to you, If Bernadette killed Kirsten because she was “bullied” and “put down by her”, why didn’t she give examples at her trial which would have strengthened her case? She didn’t give examples because she wasn’t bullied by Kirsten. Can you give examples of Kirsten “degrading” others and “thinking she is better than everyone”? Your comments continue to reiterate the plot for the movie “Death of a Cheerleader”. It was a fictional depiction loosely based on Kirsten and Bernadette.
“I was raised to treat others with respect. Real class comes from decent human beings who have respect for others”
It is abundantly clear from your comments that you do not have class and were not raised to treat others with respect, you odiously sanctimonious deluded ignoramus. Is it respectful to perpetuate lies about a murdered teenage girl due to a fictional depiction? Is it respectful to write in another comment that “Kirsten had it well deserved”, which suggests that you think Kirsten’s murder was justified? Is it respectful to suggest that Kirsten’s parents “should have raised her better” and that they are to “blame” for her murder? Blaming Kirsten’s parents for her death is the epitome of classlessness and disrespect. It also evil and sick. Shame on you.
” I don’t believe she deserved to die”
Why are you contradicting yourself? You wrote in another comment “, Kristen had it well deserved”.
“My kid knows better than to bully others”
Judging from your malicious, reprehensible comments and utter ignorance and delusion, your moral fiber is rotten to the core, and I pity any child subjected to your skewed guidance as their moral fiber will no doubt succumb to decay.
Did you ever stop and think that Bernadette was a fragile human being? Did you ever think that she would not want to try to defend herself in court with letting out the terrible things Kristen said to her and how she berated her and others because she was sorry and she felt as though that would only add insult to injury to Kristen’s family? Society in the richest places raise their children to be obnoxious and unbearable little freaks who will at some point push a normal person to the brink,so whatever happens is something they are a part of as well as the person they have pushed.
Excuse my long reply. I can’t get to the point quickly.
“Joy”, why don’t you stick to writing under one name instead of creating different aliases? Also, I’m flattered by the attention you gave me on the blog. It made me feel oh so special.
How was Bernadette a “fragile human being”? She did well in school academically, had plenty of friends, her close friends genuinely cared about her, she was described as ” popular in her own way”and she was invited to join an exclusive sorority club.
Or do you mean that you think she was a fragile human being before she brutally murdered Kirsten? How so?
Bernadette rang Kirsten’s mother to invite Kirsten to a non existent sorority dinner. She lured Kirsten out of her house under false pretences to the non existent sorority dinner and then drove Kirsten to an empty car-park at night. I think a lot of people would have found Bernadette’s plan to lure them out of their house under false pretences very disconcerting and would be angered over it like Kirsten appears to have been.
Kirsten understandably didn’t appreciate the fact that she was lured out of her house under false pretences, so she left Bernadette’s car. Bernadette then stalked Kirsten all the way to her house, ambushed her from behind with a 15/18 inch knife, inflicted Kirsten with two two foot wounds down her back and continued to stab Kirsten when she was suffering on the ground with her wounds. Bernadette would have seen the pain and anguish on Kirsten’s face, the fear and shock in Kirsten’s eyes, listened to Kirsten scream in agony (she was reported to have screamed) as she felt the knife rip through Kirsten’ skin. Bernadette was clearly very sick and disturbed, yet you appear to be minimizing or even excusing Kirsten’s murder by referring to Bernadette “as a fragile human being”, and writing ” Society in the richest places raise their children to be obnoxious and unbearable little freaks who will at some point push a normal person to the brink”.
“Did you ever think that she would not want to try to defend herself in court with letting out the terrible things Kristen said to her and how she berated her and others because she was sorry and she felt as though that would only add insult to injury to Kristen’s family?”
Rubbish. If Bernadette had considered Kirsten’s family’s feelings at all, she wouldn’t have stolen Kirsten from them by brutally murdering her. An example that shows that Bernadette didn’t have respect for Kirsten’s family and shows how detached Bernadette was from killing Kirsten was that she appeared to have no inhibitions about attending Kirsten’s funeral. She would have seen Kirsten’s parents and brother crying anguished tears of unfathomable sorrow and would have seen the inconsolable grief and despair etched into their faces, and she had the unconscionable gall to not only attend Kirsten’s funeral knowing she was responsible for putting Kirsten in her coffin, but also had the cold nerve to be in the presence of and be able to look at Kirsten’s family whose sadness and grief would have been heart wrenchingly palpable, which she knew she was responsible for. A sane or “fragile” person would not have been able to endure being confronted with so much pain that they were responsible for, yet Bernadette could and did. She could “block it out of her mind” (her words).
Was Bernadette “fragile” when she watched as two innocent girls were accused of Kirsten’s murder by the Orinda community? Was Bernadette “fragile” when she took Catechism classes with one of the accused girls and would have no doubt seen the emotional toll being falsely accused of murder would have taken on the girl, yet she acted like nothing was amiss. Was Bernadette “fragile” when she coolly discussed Kirsten’s murder with classmates, some of which include Kirsten’s friends. Was Bernadette “fragile” when her behaviour was reported to not have changed after Kirsten’s murder?
As I wrote in a previous comment to you above “rupaul/joy”, if there was evidence of Kirsten bullying Bernadette, she would have given examples which would have strengthened her case and possibly portrayed her as a sympathetic character. Why deliberately refrain from giving examples if she could have been accused of first degree murder?
The only incident Bernadette recounted was a remark Kirsten made about her skis. She couldn’t give any more examples because there was no more examples which is why there is still no clear reason why she killed Kirsten.
“Society in the richest places raise their children to be obnoxious and unbearable little freaks who will at some point push a normal person to the brink,so whatever happens is something they are a part of as well as the person they have pushed”
Please explain how Bernadette was “pushed to the brink”? Bernadette concocted a plan to get Kirsten out of her house and it appears that Kirsten got annoyed when she discovered that Bernadette lied to get her out of her house alone. Bernadette then drove Kirsten to an empty car-park and appears to have confessed feelings of admiration for her. Do you really think it’s acceptable to lure someone out of their house under false pretences and then expect a positive reaction if your lie is discovered? Kirsten ran from Bernadette’s car and wanted to be left alone, yet Bernadette stalked Kirsten to her house. If anyone was “pushed to the brink”, it was Kirsten, but instead of reacting violently, she fled from Bernadette’s car.
“Society in the richest places raise their children to be obnoxious and unbearable little freaks”
Orinda was not Beverly Hills. It was full of middle – class and upper- middle class families. Bernadette lived in a wealthier area than Kirsten. The only “freak” in this tragic story is Bernadette.
Karen, everyone reading your comments sees you as the odious one. You want to defend your friend and so you should but once you start calling names and trampling over the comments of others you single yourself out as a bully. I am merely reading the comments after viewing the movie and indeed if the movie mischaracterized Bernadette then her parents should sue them. They might not win but they can make a case for smearing the name of their daughter if indeed she was not a bully. But you are not making her case by behaving like a bully yourself.
Star!! So classy and dead on. I’m embarrassed for her.
You’re going off the crappy movie. That movie was terrible and blamed the victim for her own murder. There was no justification for murder even if the victim was a bully, which it seems she was, at worst, catty.
Dylan and Erik’s parents were loaded. They were rich. lol Dylan’s mother saying “We weren’t rich. We bought a do up property.” Upper middle class at least.
You took the words right out of my mouth! I had to deal with people like Kirsten in high school. There was this one girl that was so jealous of me, that she spread lies about me to her “sorority friends” and kept me from pledging her sorority. I hardly knew this girl. Thank God I’m out of high school now and don’t have to deal with all that social crap. The sad thing is that adults act the same way. I don’t understand what is wrong with people. I have always treated others the way I want to be treated. I was born with common sense.
Yes. At 50 years old, I too have been bullied my whole life. I was shy, empathetic and depressed. Girls, women at any age can be so horrible. The bullying, the lies, the jealousy and competition is so toxic and they will murder your soul. I still have nightmares of many girlfriends ignoring me, making fun of me and being just vicious. I suffer from PTSD. No I would never kill someone from being bullied but I totally understand some people who do. That pain of being relentlessly bullied stays with you your whole life and your self worth is damaged. I isolate now due to the fact women have betrayed me so badly. Ive been suicidal just from being bullied.
Nancy I know exactly how you feel. I been bullied to. It stayed with me for many years, not as bad as it did, but it did for a long time. Girls in Jr high and high School can be Brutal. Guys can be, girls are Worse. They are Cat Mean. It took me 2 decades to deal with it, couldn’t before.
Nancy I would of never considered Murder, that is just plain Sick. Bernadette is Sick. She still is as far as I’m concerned. Who’s to say she hasn’t Murdered again, if so, she Covered her tracks better, and probaly let an innocent person take the blame and maybe jailed for it. She is a Sociopath.
And How!!! I was on a few adult precision ice skating teams, and let me tell you, some of the women who were on the teams were a hell of a lot worse than high school girls!!
You’re talking about Tori Spelling in a movie being a minor bully not Kirsten whom you know next to nothing about. I agree bullying is so terrible but there wasn’t much evidence that Kirsten was a bully apart from Bernadette saying Kirsten once mentioned that her ski boots looked cheap, I think Kirsten was a lesbian with a crush on Kirsten but was taking that secret to her grave.
It doesn’t sound as if Kirsten bullied Bernadette, other than the one comment about her ski gear. Bernadette never said it in her testimony, from what I can tell. If she’d been bullied by Kirsten, seems like she’d have told it in detail.
You have no idea what you are talking about with Columbine. Maybe you need to hear one of those shooters moms speak on YouTube on the Ted talks. I live minutes from Columbine Highschool and you have absolutely no clue. Those boys were wealthy and were far from bullied. You need to educate yourself before speaking on things you have no clue about.
Thisb isn’t about Columbine, it’s about the Kirsten Costas case. Check your Stories and facts before you post Nonsense,
The people implying that Kristen had it coming, or whoever else blamed her parents, are, in life, the jealous Bernadette types. I mean she stabbed another girl to death because she was afraid to get made fun of at school or be outed or whatever. Bernadette was and most likely still is a highly disturbed individual. Parent blaming is so ridiculous in this case but, if any parents are to blame, maybe it’s bernadettes . She clearly wasn’t happy with them and their old, unfashionable selves either, adding that they didn’t give her, their 6th child, the attention she so desperately wanted. If it was your child that was murdered for some idiotic reasons…I’m sure your perspective would change. Bernadettes own parents turned her in. And she still got a second chance at life. Feeling bad for Bernadette bc was a pathetic, weak, emotionally unstable girl, fragile or whatever …doesn’t change the fact that she’s also a murderer. It could’ve been anyone, but kristen was the last one to get into the bobbies so she stood out.
I know some fragile ppl, and they’d kill themselves before someone else. Think of what you’re saying…fragile ppl don’t turn to homicide. Hostile people do.
Agree!
WOW MIRANDA, IT SOUNDS LIKE YOU MIGHT HAVE A TRIGGER TOO. YOU NEED TO LEAVE BERNADETTE TO GOD, AND YOUR NOT HIM.
This is what can happen when you are a bully. Bernadette was better looking then Kirsten. Too bad Bernadette couldn’t see that..
Sarah, well, MURDER IS NOT AN OPTION!! What is horrible is how pathetic Bernadette was to begin with. You obviously are very contradicting since from gathering what the “Hollywood” movie has told you if Kirsten was truly a “witch”, then, Bernadette was a bigger idiot since she wanted to befriend such a person to begin with. It shows what a shallow, loser, she was. She had plenty of friends like in the film who loved her, but she cared only about superficial things, and people. The tragedy is some of you morons cannot get through your head that you cannot make the world like you!!! Secondly, if you actually did your research on the true case, and not some Hollywood movie who portrayed supposedly Kirsten, who was of Greek American heritage a blond, and Bernadette, who was the real blond, a brunette. Hollywood tends to make villains heroes, and innocent people into villains. It also tends to victimize blonds! Your argument is Sort of pointless, and hypocritical considering that Bernadette did not value TRUE FEELINFS, FREINDSHIPS!!! Her main concern when being caught was people finding out who she was, and people hating her rather then easing the pain of the parents who obviously would never be the same considering they buried their own child (who had not had a chance to live, and have life beyond her own) before they buried themselves! People like you expect the world to owe you something. Bernadette admitted to many friends she craved the wealthy life, and hated that her own parents (whom I feel sorry for) were so old. She dared to say she could not commit suicide because her religion would not allow it, but did not take into consideration the life of Kirstens! Shame on such a post you wrote! She is what people who know psychology well, especially Criminal Psychology, a Sociopath! Everything is Me! Me! Me! When it came to Bernadette. Even religion, which is supposed to be about mostly how you treat others. She turned it about herself! She didnt care wheather her mom or dad suffered, she just would not subject herself to something like suicide because she loves herself more then anyone else. I hope she prays from the bottom of her heart, because the pain she caused the Costas’ well, she will have to pray forever!!! Also, HELL NO Bernadette was not cuter, or prettier then Kirsten. Kirsten was exotic, and beautiful. Not a plaine jane….get real. You call the pic of her double chin better looking? I think NOT!
I’m sorry but I disagree. I feel sorry for Bernadette. I can’t stand snobby bitches who put others down and bully them. This is exactly why the Columbine shooting happened, and why these things happen in the first place. There is no justification for murder, and I am not siding with the criminals, but you can push someone so far.
“Rupaul”
Can you give examples of Kirsten bullying Bernadette? If Bernadette killed Kirsten because she was “bullied” and “put down by her”, why didn’t she give examples at her trial which would have strengthened her case? She didn’t give examples because she wasn’t bullied by Kirsten. Columbine has nothing to do with case and you know well that the two can’t be compared. How did Kirsten push Bernadette “so far”? Kirsten was lured out of her house under false pretences to a bobbie (sorority) dinner that didn’t exist by someone she wasn’t friends or even acquaintances with. She was then driven to an empty car- park at night and was justifiably angry with Bernadette over it. Most people would be angered and perturbed by that kind of behavior.
“There is no justification for murder, and I am not siding with the criminals, but you can push someone so far”
Really? In another one of your comments your wrote “Well said Sarah. Kristen had it well deserved” in response to someone else, which suggests that you think her cruel murder was justified. Judging from your comments you clearly have sided with Bernadette, so why contradict yourself? Read the facts of the case instead of perpetuating lies that Kirsten “pushed” Bernadette or that she “bullied” Bernadette.
Rupaul
You seem to have the mentality of a child.
Are you bullied in school?
Please make an appointment with your councilor at school and discuss this with him or her…
Good luck dear
Please, get yourself some help.
For what? Being disgusted with a murderer and defending a murder victim? Being disgusted with the the murderer’s nonchalant behaviour after her brutal crime? Being disgusted that the murderer allowed two innocent girls to be accused of the murder?
You sympathize with a murderer and deliberately perpetuate lies about her victim under different aliases, yet you are telling someone else to get help? Your lack of self awareness is both amusing and perplexing.
Karen I read your comments n I totally agreed with you. Nothing should move a person to kill another. If we have the fear of God n understand the importance of God’s creation. You will think positive then allow being moved by what ppl say or do. Put God first. Even if her friend was bullying don’t give right to take life. No one have to take the greatest gift God gives,LIFE
Ok, I agree with you that Kirsten was better-looking, but you realize that Bernadette was part Italian, right? Not boring (ugly, maybe, not boring), and also thus not a natural blonde. I’m betting you’re some white chick who wouldn’t know.
Either way, it doesn’t matter because Bernadette is a bitch, which is more important any day than looks.
Plenty of Italians are natural blondes. What are you talking about??
In northern italy they have blonde hair fair and blue eyes .
Bernadette was prettier. I think she had a crush on Kirsten and was terrified of Kirsten telling everyone she was a lesbian.
In your dreams Bernadette was better looking! You’ve got to be kidding right?!
Lol the people saying bernadette was better looking and Kristen had it coming, oh boy…hoping your not the ugly neighbor living on my block and lurking in my bushes. My god you women are something else. You have no one to blame but yourselves for being unnattractive, fat, disliked, broke losers…whatever your issues are. Kristen was adorable. And not a fuckn psycho. That’s a win win. The rest of you can lurk around and limp your hunchback selves to therapy. There is absolutely no justifying what she did and if you feel justified…then at the core, you are the problem, not the pretty, popular girl. Be honest with yourselves. Jealousy is an ugly thing…much like bernadette.
Your eyes are deceiving you. I know beauty is all a matter of perception, not that it matters but in no universe would Bernadette be considered better looking. Bernadette was homely; Kirsten was pretty. Kirsten wasn’t a bully. Educate yourself about this case, you simple minded degenerate. Too bad Bernadette WAS a pathetic psychopathic freak.
Really,
Well based on the movie, Kristen came off as a total snob and bully.
“Rupaul”
The characters were loosely based on Kirsten and Bernadette. The script for the movie was written by Randall Sullivan who wrote the one-sided scathingly critical “Death of a Cheerleader” article for Rolling Stone, which the movie was based on. Randall admitted that he felt no sympathy for Kirsten and that is clearly evident in the movie as he deliberately portrayed Kirsten’s character as an insufferable, unlikable bully bitch in order for Bernadette’s character to come across as sympathetic as possible because he identified with her. I would suggest that you should be able to distinguish between a fictional depiction and reality, but judging from your comments it is clearly beyond your capacity to do so.
“Well based on the movie…” Yeah, that’s your problem. The movie, like most movies, is no an accurate account. Even before I read about the real case, I thought the movie blamed the victim way too much. IN REALITY, Kristen was, at worst, sometimes catty to Bernadette. Bernadette had jealousy issues. There’s no excuse for murder. Read the article, read more on the actual case, stop judging real people based on a low-budget lifetime movie.
There’s a reason why they changed the names for the movie because it was a fictionalized version and seemed entirely based on Bernadette’s version of events and not anyone else’s.
Amen Shelly. Bunch of Bernadettes lurking around everywhere.
Kirsten was a cute sweet looking little thing. Bernadette was described as homely.
homely??lol go guys and do some research..the real Bernadette was very beautiful,(but poor) while the real Kristen was very average (but rich)…Kristen well deserved her fate,all the bullies making other’s life miserable…no sympathy from me at all.
Why are you so focused on what they looked like? I disagree with you. I thought Kirsten was a very pretty little thing. If you did your “research”, you would know that Kirsten didn’t bully Bernadette. You are a sick minded individual to perpetuate that lie about Kirsten, but I suppose it’s easier for you and your ilk to criticize a dead teenager because she it’s not like she can defend herself, is it? To suggest that Kirsten deserved what happened to her because she didn’t appreciate the fact that Bernadette lied to her to get her out of her house under the pretence of a “bobbies” initiation dinner, is very, very sick and evil and I hope for the sake of others around you that you are on some sort of medication because you appear to have issues. Also, Kirsten was upper middle class and lived in a less expensive area than Bernadette.
It would appear that kirsten marina costas was a spoilt rich kid who never had to go without any luxuries at all. She was mercilessly cruel to anyone who was nothing like her although death in my opinion was far too good for her or any other bully. The best way is to bring bullies down a peg or a few. That could hurt much more than death. Poor bernadette seemed very vulnerable and in need of help. She needed friends, more encouragement from teachers, not teasing and ostracisation. People need others not bullying. This type of case just proves what can happen when bullies go too far. We are all different. Some are quick, rich, own the finest and the most expensive of anything. Others are not so lucky. is it really about wealth, splendour etc? No, it is about love, people. So I would say to any bully, we all have our weaknesses,
so dont mock, offer to help thus build bridges.
You don’t know whether or not Kirsten had to go without anything. Her family were upper-middle class, not multi millionaires. Bernadette’s family lived in a more expensive area than Kirsten, so what does that tell you? There is no evidence of Kirsten being “mercilessly cruel” to anyone. If Kirsten was “mercilessly cruel” to Bernadette, it would have been brought up at Bernadette’s trial which would have strengthened her case, but it wasn’t brought up because it didn’t happen. You clearly are basing your opinions on a movie – a fictional depiction. Bernadette had plenty of friends who loved her. She was also friends with people who were considered popular. She was not some vulnerable lost soul who was bullied mercilessly. She fit it fine and was considered to “be popular in her own way”. She was also a very good student who did well academically in school. There was no “teasing and ostracisation”. You appear to be making up scenarios in your head about Bernadette’s life and have difficulty differentiating fact from fiction. You need to get help for that, sweetie.
The reason why Bernadette killed Kirsten is because Kirsten didn’t appreciated the fact that she was lured out of her house under the pretence of a Bobbies sorority initiation dinner by someone she wasn’t friends or even acquaintances with. Bernadette then drove Kirsten to an empty car park at night and appears to have confessed feelings of admiration for Kirsten. That would disturb most people. Bernadette then stalked Kirsten all the way to her house which would anger and disturb most people.
“We are all different. Some are quick, rich, own the finest and the most expensive of anything. Others are not so lucky”
Your point is irrelevant and has absolutely nothing to do with the case. Bernadette fit in fine and lived in a lovely area. Her inadequacies were all created by her and in her own head and she murdered Kirsten as a result.
“No, it is about love, people. So I would say to any bully, we all have our weaknesses,”
Judging by the comment you have written, you know nothing about love. You are disturbing and evil by stating that death was too good for Kirsten, an innocent victim of a brutal murder.
You are bullying a dead teenage girl by deliberately and knowingly perpetuating lies about her because you appear to identify with Angela Delvecchio in “Death of a Cheerleader” ( a character that doesn’t exist and is not a real representation of what Bernadette Protti was like). Does it make you feel good to knowingly lie about a dead murdered girl? Love indeed.
Well said Sarah. Kristen had it well deserved.
Are you suggesting by your comment “Kirsten had is well deserved” that Kirsten “deserved” to be murdered because she understandably didn’t take kindly to being lured out of her house under false pretences to a bobbie (sorority) dinner that didn’t exist by someone she wasn’t friends or even acquaintances with and was then driven to an empty car-park at night. Bernadette then appears to have confessed her feelings of admiration for Kirsten in the empty car-park at night. Most people would find that bizarre and off-putting and would certainly not deserve to be killed over it.
You’re going off a movie…a fictionalized account. Read the article. Lot of weirdos on this thread. Probably chubby ugly girls who were bullied as kids.
I have been watching “The Cheerleader Murder” on my iPhone for a few years now, and one of the lines was, “Bernadette was part of the in crowd, but she didn’t see it! Her self esteem was riding on Kirsten’s approval!”
I have also wondered if her self esteem was also riding on the two most important people of all-her parents!! But they never said! She must have really had a low opinion of herself!!
I agree! I can’t stand bullies.
“Rupaul”
Can you give examples of Kirsten bullying Bernadette? If Bernadette killed Kirsten because she was “bullied” by her, why didn’t she give examples at her trial, which would have strengthened her case? She didn’t give examples because she wasn’t bullied by Kirsten.
You are still getting that she was a bully from the movie where they changed everyone’s name because they weren’t doing a real version.
Kelly wrong there Kirsten didn’t deserve to be murder she was innocent teenager who happened to a crazy obsessed girl wanting to be her and there no evidence of Kirsten being a bully
Kelly maybe you should read the comment you just left. Get yourself checked out! lmao
There is no way Bernadette is better than Kirsten. Kirsten was beautiful. You guys are kidding yourselves. Bunch of f—–g liars. I’m sorry but not sorry to be petty but Bernadette has a huge f—–g nose and hamster cheeks topped with a double chin. Kirsten had exotic features from her full volumes curly locks to her tan skin…not to mention her eyes were also sky blue. I don’t care how old your comment is, I just have to reply to that bulls–t.
People, can’t we all just get along and respect one another’s opinion? You all sound a bit like the people you are gossiping about. Look inwards and think with consideration before you speak.
I’m not arguing with and don’t mean to appear hostile and wouldn’t have bothered replying until I read that you are suggesting that “you all” (which I suppose includes me) sound like the people you are gossiping about”.
Is it difficult to understand why a person might not respect the opinion of someone else who supports a murderer? Especially someone who not only blames the murder victim for her brutal murder, but also blames her innocent parents?
“You all sound a bit like the people you are gossiping about”
What? A murderer? My comments aren’t “gossip”.
“Look inwards and think with consideration before you speak”
Likewise. All the best.
The full length picture of Kirsten with her hair tied back is so cute. She looks like she would have lit up a room. How tragic she was murdered over basically nothing.
I don’t know why you are saying nice things about Kristen she was very mean and she said stuff that offended people she stop acting like she was innocent
No Tori Spelling’s character in a fictionalized movie was a bit mean.
And you know that how?….
Wow all this bantering back and forth how sad. Lemme tell all of you a little something because I lived and breathed the entire lifestyle of growing up in orinda and knew both Bernadette and kirsten. I was in 8 the grade with Kirsten’s brother Peter and Bernadette had babysat me years prior and was very sweet. Bernadette was just as nice as we were on swim team together growing up. Living in orinda back in the 80s&90s was no easy task if you indidn’t wear the right clothes or drive the nice brand new car you wernt shit .
You know what’s really sad? A grown woman from England pretending to be someone who knew Bernadette, Kirsten, or Kirsten’s brother. What’s wrong with you? You copied your little story from some other website. Seriously, what’s wrong with you?
????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
You got to be kidding me.
No one is killed without a reason. One version is that she was so good and bullied and another that she is a monster prepare to kill just like that? No, there is good and bad in every person, just the people are guilty for not seeing the reasons that cause that kind of things. We don’t see the others, don’t mix with their lives, not care for them, stay away or just say “It’s better that something happens to others, not me”, but we don’t get the message to be just more polite. Is it so hard to do without hurt someone? Would you say the same if Bernadette did suicide? No , then it’s gona be “she was mental ill” and forgotten forever yes? We all are mental ill and could snap in a minute, so be good for yourself and others. In more conservative societes in the world(it’s not USA) the educators and family see these things in the early stages and try to prevent them. In USA is more important to be popular, not smart, no matter how you treat others – you become popular just because you say some joke or anything else to molest the person. And you don’t give a fuck cause you are popular? The profesors are going home and the parents are at work all day and dont have a time for kids, so what do you expect from society like that. There are more murders in american continent than in Europe and it’s not in the time of war. Teenagers killed each other for being bullied or cause they are lesbian? It’s sad, that’s the biggest problem in this world? very sad.
I think Bernadette was a lesbian that’s why she felt she couldn’t have Kirsten tell everyone that she fancied her.
Bernadette went to private grade school called St. Perpetua’s in Lafayette Ca. Next to Orinda. The school was a freak show. The priests were rapist. One was transferred there because of problems with boys. Word was that girls were safe because raping a girl is irresponsible and could get them fired because girls could get pregnant and priest need to bring money in, not pay out for 18 years. So start the story there. Her parents poor,.. yes, but spent money on that. Interesting. It was a strange time growing up around religious freaks. The judgemental insecurities started there for Bernadette and everyone else that was raised in those conditions.
I didn’t know Kirsten very well. She was friends with my sister, came around our house a few times. I do remember she was very insecure and would pick on B clearly an attempt to boost her confidence. Sad because K had it all as I saw it. I do remember all the stories before and after the killing. Who knows what was true or not. But I do know that two families had to move out of town because the girls wore all black and kept to them selves.. Believe me it was a 6 month witch hunt. I remember the day every girl attended school when the killer had been caught but we had no name; if they had to fly back, leave the hospital, watever, no girl wanted to be accused for even 24 hours even if they would be exonerated the next day or week. that HS was a tough place especially for girls.
Word around town was that K was stabbed 18 times. I believe that the real number was held by the cops. I remember one time coming back from skiing, my friend and I were saying how we should stab the killer 18 times for what she did. Obviously we didn’t know B was the killer. She threw up sour cream and onion chips. Smelled so bad. Couldn’t get the smell out of car for weeks. B was so quiet of a person we figured just talking about something like that made her sick.
Between 10-15 years ago bullying came into the news. i remember always thinking that B’s case would had been much different today. I still can’t help from thinking that, but largely I think B killed K because K was blocking B from her rise in popularity.
I don’t believe Kirsten was a Bully. Maybe Snooty, but no Bully. You knew both girls? Kirsten’s house was Smaller than Bernadettes, how was Kirsten all around was she friendly?
Why isn’t anyone talking about the incompetency of the police here? They had Bernadette as a suspect and only give her a lie detector test? They don’t even bother to investigate her alibi to see if she was telling the truth? If it hadn’t have been for Bernadette’s confession, this case probably would remain unsolved. I also think that it’s utterly ridiculous that she got only 9 years for committing murder. I don’t care if she was only 15, murder is murder and she should have been locked away for far longer. Finally, as an aside, I think some people need to learn the difference between fiction and reality. Just because there was bullying in a fictional movie, doesn’t mean the Bernadette was bullied by Kirsten in real life.
Yea I agree
The police did a bad job
This whole story is just disgusting. So this murderer just gets off free after 8 years and gets to live her life because (somebody picked on her)????? I still can’t believe this individual who killed someone because of jealousy, if she was so down in the dumps – they why didn’t she just KILL herself??????
She wanted to, but decided not to go through with it. In PEOPLE, the article stated that Bernadette feared hurting her family by leaving them behind: “If I kill myself, I will hurt people even more (my family).” [13 May 1985, Arthur Lubow] I think it’s also safe to assume that her Catholic faith played a part in her decision.
Just saw the new Lifetime movie “Death of a Cheerleader”. What a bizarre story. So tragic that Kirsten was brutally murdered. No matter if she was cocky or snobby; irrelevant. Hard to comprehend how this Bernadette flew into a rage and savagely murdered her classmate. Senseless. I am really stunned that she only spent 8 years in jail. How is that possible. For murder! I feel for the Costas family.
My honest opinion on this is that I think that Kirsten didn’t deserve to die. She looked like a nice person that had a good life ahead of her. Same for Bernadette, but she had to make this choice that will change her life. Sad. Killed a girl because you were jealous? Now thats just sad. Maybe she did say some things that you didn’t like, but for real! Killing her just because you were jealous? This is what makes me sad the most. Kirsten had a good family, good life, and then this horrendous event took her life. And whenever she went to that parking lot to say that she admired Kirsten, that’s probably the reason why she said her friend “Got weird.” I would have gotten weirded out too if my friend addmitted that she thought that I was perfect, pretty, and good at everything. But I will feel honored at the same time…but I still would have been weirded out. And she killed her because she was jealous and that she would have been humiliuated if Kirsten told people at school that she was admiring her. And only 7 years in jail with parrole?! Honestly! She could have gotten all of her 9 years. Now the new version of the movie was making Bernadette innocent, when Kirsten was innocent herself. But this is just my opinion, don’t come after me :/
Quote from the poster “me”:
So this murderer just gets off free after 8 years and gets to live her life because (somebody picked on her)?
Protti didn’t get a short sentence because she claimed to have been picked on. There was no jury in the trial. She got a short sentence because she was tried as a minor.
Bernadette Protti is believed to have changed her name, gotten married (causing her last name to change again), and became a nurse and medical journal author in suburban Dallas (Grapevine TX). She apparently moved again and left the medical field, probably because her real name and location was outed by amateur internet “detectives”.
I would love to hear Bernadette being interviewed now about that tragic night in suburban Oakland. But that has about a millionth of a percent chance of ever happening.
Completely agree with you Midwest Jimmy. Sure would be interesting to hear the “truth” behind this tragic story instead of listening to this “gossip and speculation “ of what both girls were like and how they behaved. Unless any of these people commenting knew these girls personally and their families, they don’t have a place to judge either one of these girls who lived this tragic event. I have to laugh with this being 2021 and the person with the most judgment has the name of “Karen”. 😂
I was a 1985 highschool graduate.i had skipped a grade so my classmates were more mature physically and socially. I was the daughter of a single mom who was a teacher. I also was in a school where most others came from two income families and most of the parents were accountants, lawyers or doctors. I understand wanting to have what your friends have. I think Bernadette went about it in the wrong way. She should have been happy With the circle of friends and family she had. I don’t buy into the lesbian theory. I think she wanted to be part of the elite click.
I am shocked to even read that some people think this 15 year old girl deserved to die because she could be a little snobby at school, I personally would prefer my children to be friends at school with a snobby girl than a cold blooded killer! Bernadette planned everything down to the last detail, even telling Kirsten’s Mum to ask Kirsten not to tell anyone about the supposed ‘dinner’ that night. And if Kirsten was so bad and such a ‘bully’ why did Bernadette want to be friends with her so badly? Rubbish, it was jealousy and pure rage. Her parole would have gone ahead sooner apparently but in 1992 one of the parole board Victor Wisehart voted to keep her in jail as she showed an inability to control her anger and he felt that she was still a danger to the public, she had had a violent altercation with a ‘boyfriend’ in the prison/school system, he said there was a hidden trigger that switched on when she didn’t get her own way! She was released the following year. My sympathies are with the Costa’s family and i hope they have managed to move on.
I agree with Karen, you can’t prove Kirsten bullied Bernadette. “Just hearsay”. So Kirsten was Cocky at times. What teen isn’t? No right to murder.
I knew both gals. Like I said, Kirsten was so much fun. She didn’t have enemies,(that were known), just a fallout with Nancy. But it wasn’t a big fallout, just words between them…….. Karen, where are you? Love your integrity on all this. You are right, (Kirsten didn’t really bully Bernadette) around a friend she would throw ice at Bernadette, and tease her to “ show off” in front of thier friend, (but girls will be girls)……. I feel if it was true bullying she would be afraid to be near “Kirsten” and these people who call Kirsten a snot and said she was a “Bully” and deserved it, Karen’s right you’re the “Bullies” cause you know Zilch about any of this. We need an Memorial Page set up for Kirsten. Kirsten didn’t have anything against Bernadette before the murder….So Kirsten made a few comments. If Kirsten was going to out Bernadette she would of told Alex Arnold all about her. She refused to. She may of just wanted to scare Bernadette so she would leave her alone (Bernadette)… Bernadette took things way to personal, and, “ it became Personal”….. Joe Kosla hi.
You that said “Kirsten was mean”, don’t know her, or anything about her. She had moments, and she told her feelings about people. She was “happy go lucky” mostly, she only had a couple (she didn’t like), we all have someone we do t get long with. Kirsten had a good heart though. One girl she got mad at for saying stupid stuff around her and embarrassing her. Kirsten told her she embarrassed her, and, “she didn’t want to be around her”. Kirsten didn’t like people who acted (Dumb) or got into trouble and cause trouble. She wasn’t into that game. That’s how she probably got associated with not liking people who didn’t fit in. You act dumb you won’t fit in (anywhere). One girl said stupid stuff that embarrassed you, and cussed all the time, and other girls who smoked or cussed, she didn’t associate with them, she didn’t want around them. Kirsten was a straight A student and involved in activities, she wanted to run with top kids. She didn’t bully, but she told people how she felt. She didn’t have time to (bully). She was to busy of a girl. So you say she was a bully, well prove it. I never seen her bully. So if she didn’t like you, probably you did something to irritate her and she let you know it. She was good at that. She didn’t bully Bernadette either. She probably just told her off, like she did the other’s. “Kirsten was well liked and cared”. If she didn’t like someone , there was a reason. She didn’t hate anyone. She didn’t like their ways mostly. Basically ,she liked everybody.
Rupaul and Sarah, Bernadette has friends and “fit in”. She was a member of a highly selective sorority club called “the Bobbies”. Where are you getting she had no friends and was “bullied”. No there were several girls bullied, but Bernadette wasn’t one. She fit in and was as popular as Kirsten’s 2 close friends (Diane and Stacy), Bernadette wanted more…. She wanted in with Kirsten and she was afraid Kirsten would discuss the conversation, she held her captive till Kirsten escaped. I wasn’t there, but it sounded like she was holding her till she agreed to be friends on her terms, (Bernadette’s). And Sarah saying Kirsten got what she deserved. No one deserves to be murdered. (Kirsten sure didn’t), Saying bullies need to get what they deserve. Well you’re bullying Kirsten( as Karen said) a dead girl who can’t defend herself, that you know nothing about… That movie was one sided. I bet when you were 15 Sarah you were mouthy to, “like Kirsten and all teens”.: Were you a perfect teen who got along with everyone and never said anything unkind to anyone ever? If so, sweetie I want to meet you. We’re you bullied and had to defend yourself and going by that with Bernadette? Bernadette I’m telling you was well liked and a good Student got good grades and was in with popular kids, cause she was smart. Her house was nice to,(as nice as Kirsten’s) so she wasn’t a lonely poor girl who struggled for friends. She had a circle of friends, “ Kirsten was more popular though”. We had lonely girls who were bullied and goth girls and loose girls. We had quite a few of them there. Even if you weren’t rich, if you were smart and acted sensible ‘“ you were accepted”’. We had honor students who were kind of poor, but we loved them, and learned from them. So before you start judging Kirsten, first get facts.
Paris Mahone did you know Kirsten? How do you know she was mean? Give me an example.
Kirsten wasn’t a bully at all. Those movies aren’t for real! People are going by that. Wish someone who knew facts would tell us about the real events leading up to Kirsten’s death. I know there were Bogus postings from Kirsten’s classmates. But would a real student please come forward and reveal yourself….
“But would a real student please come forward and reveal yourself.”
That already happened. Read the posts from August 2019.
As for me, I’m the same age as the girls involved in the case. But I don’t remember hearing or learning about it until many years later. Maybe it wasn’t a big national story at the time, and was more of a California Bay area story (I’m from Illinois). If it was national news, I missed it.
Kirsten was so adorable. She was a typical teenage girl who just wanted to have fun with “her friends”…. She did to, and Bernadette had fun with us as well. They were more aquainted than you think. (Yes at times) Kirsten teased Bernadette, but they were still mutually acquainted… Bernadette never could figure out why she thought she was a “Bullied failure”…. People looked up to her to….. Even if Kirsten was “stuck up” and a Bully! still no right to murder anyone. All teen gals are (snotty) for the most part, but grow out of it. Bernadette could be to at times… She was no Angel some thought of her as “Stuck up”…(Bernadette that is) and her BFF was kind of popular, but not as popular and Bernadette, Stacy, Diane, Jessica and Carrie. Kirsten was more popular she was up there high… She had it all, and some were jealous of her popularity. The Homecoming Court was as popular (if not more) popular than Kirsten. Some girls considered all those girls “Stuck up” they considered Bernadette as well. I was even accused of being (Stuck up)… We were all just “Misunderstood”. (The misfits) we really didn’t see them as Misfits. We had our own group, and we didn’t really talk much to them, (other than hello)… Some of those kids there that were misfits, hate to tell you, some of them weren’t “Angels”… They dressed rough and acted (Bad) and cussed…. We didn’t want to associate with them, cause we didn’t want to get in trouble… We got good grades and did what we were suppose to, our way of (having fun) and “Choices” were different than theirs. They weren’t socially accepted on account of the choices they made….. Berns BFF chose to support her( that set her apart)… In Orinda if you act like a Bad A.. you won’t be accepted. You cuss and run loose you won’t be accepted. Smoking and cussing that is mostly the ones that were disliked.
Those bullied girls like I said “were loose” or cussed and smoked and (dressed roughly)….. So some of them will say “Orinda had snobs”. To them maybe…. It wasn’t so much how you dressed, or how much money your family had, it was on “how you acted”…….. Our Gymn Teacher was impressed on how a lot of us girls got along, only time we bickered is when we played Soccer…… We were a family….. If there was people in need, in the Bobbies we helped those people….. if someone didn’t have nice clothes we were they’re Secret Santa at Christmas time… If someone wasn’t as smart, (we didn’t knock them down), we helped them… Kirsten did to,(so did Bernadette)… In fact, Bernadette wanted to help the poor…. So RuPaul,Kelly and Sarah, you all need to get facts before you say Kirsten got what she deserved…. you weren’t there so shut up… I agree with Karen… Karen get your pretty face back on here… Is this the same Karen I grew up with?.
BTW, Bernadette was not “bullied” or the lonely girl the movie portrayed her, (she had lots of friends) was “popular”… So you that said “Kirsten bullied her”, get the facts straight. That didn’t happen that way. Kirsten and she sort of got along, and,( sort of didn’t). It wasn’t any big deal, or so, we didn’t think it was. There were several bullied as I said before. Bern wasn’t one of them, in fact, (as I said) she was well liked and in with a lot of the i crowd.
The main point so many of you are missing is a beautiful young girl lost her life! Whoever remotely tries to justify that must not have children. The girl that stole her life from her should’ve never been released from prison. She’s obviously mentally ill . This poor girl never got to grow up and experience life all because some horrible, disturbed girl murdered her. It doesn’t matter why and there are no excuses to take another persons life unless it’s to protect your own or your families .
Vanessa I agree… I knew both girls. From a standpoint Kirsten was “Adorable” and fun person. Bernadette was to in a (round about way)… She wasn’t as popular as Kirsten, she desired to have the things Kirsten had. I hear Bernadette is depressed a lot these days. She’s pretty much out of the picture, her “YouTube” gets messages from (Kirsten from Heaven) that’s sick whoever’s doing that. Bernadette her family says she is suffering from Depression maybe “karma” collecting. Her BFF I think is also real sick, she’s “down to nothing”. “Kirsten is forever missed”. I think Bernadette’s Youtube is fake now. I agree Bernadette should of at least got 20 years like (Karen Severson and Laura Doyle) murder of Missy Availa, that happened a year after Kirstens like 5 hours South of us. I’m not sure about that case, but Kirsten I can’t picture her being a bully, “yes telling how she felt”, that she did well. I never saw her actually bully and some said they can’t picture Kirsten ever being “unkind”… Kirsten was loved by many very many. She was the (In crowd) Bernadette was desiring to be the incrowd. Do I think it was premeditated. Yes. Cause Bern for weeks went on and on about Kirsten to where her friends kept getting tired of hearing it. Yes it’s ok to talk, but run it into the ground, it gets old after awhile. Her friends got to where they avoided her if possible. ( Some did) I did cause it was getting ridiculous. I never imagined she would literally kill Kirsten, cause Bernadette was so quiet and her demeanor said nothing about her being a killer at all. She let 2:girls take the blame. They had to leave school. A few left our school, one who went out with a lot of football players getting wasted, she was “demonized badly also”. A few more saying they didn’t fit in and refuses to come to Reunions, I say you don’t want to come then don’t. We’re not sympathizing with you, (grow up and get over it)… They’re not going to beg you to come, and if you don’t want to be found cause your life was miserable, we’re not really interested in finding you and apologizing. What’s been done has been done. Move on. 3 decades later that’s ridiculous. Bernadette isn’t coming anyway, she is not well anymore. No one really cares why. She comes back to see her mom “her dad passed”. I hear she disguised herself when she comes to Orinda wears shades over her eyes, and lives behind a long lane (mom does). So Vanessa I answer your questions. Yes we all feel that way, but nothing can be done about it, decision has already been made. I love Kirsten think about her all the time. She had friends to, some were Bernadette’s, and they don’t care to hear from or about Bernadette anymore. They’re not looking forward to seeing her. A lot of murder cases they get s light sentence or aquitted, but they also get harassed by the “public and media” so they don’t get off all the way, the media torments them. They still do Bernadette and always will, so she has to look over her head every second. I hear her husband knew all along about her. Well he’s probaly no better.
Wow. People really do suck.
Karen, keep repeating the same Comment over and
Over, if Kirsten bullied B why didn’t B use it to Strenghten her Case. We get it now, we already got it. B was a Psycho and always will be. That Bullying was a Copout.
Kirsten wasn’t a Bully, she was Conceited and stuck up. She only had certain friends. I know a person who knew her, she was a snob, so to speak, but she didn’t deserve to die. The person I knew didn’t hate Kirsten, she just thought she was Snooty or Misunderstood. She never had words with Kirsten, just said Kirsten hardly talked to her, maybe once or twice in her entire life. She said Bernadette was kind of Snooty also.
My friend was surprised it was Bernadette who murdered Kirsten! Cause Bernadette was stuck up to, or that’s how Bernadette appeared. She may of been misunderstood. Most of the Bobbies were Snooty. Bernadette and Kirsten were friends supposedly.
I so disagree with some of the posters. I was there too. Kristen was a bitch (sorry, fact), who would roll her eyes at randoms and point and laugh at people. Ms Bunch and McDonald (proving I knew them) were not mean like that just self absorbed. Kristen was a total bully, just horrible. She did have the cutest clothes of all time and knew it. Very, very mean. Bernie has a sweet melancholy. Her family was not the same. Much more middle class.
Mats Kirsten probaly didn’t like you, don’t mean she was that way to everybody. I’ve heard she was Bubbly and funny. This is Bern or her sister, or even BFF. I highly doubt I would like you either. Bernadette had no reason to murder, she’s just a cold blooded killer. Even if Kirsten was a Snot, she would of grown out of it long before now. Bet you didn’t walk on Water yourself as a teen, bet you were smart Aleck, most teen girls are, and they grow out of it, don’t give them the right to be killed. Kirsten won’t grow out of hers, Bernadette took that chance from her. If she was mad, she should of just beat the crap out of Kirsten, not kill her. I’m not saying Kirsten was totally innocent, for it takes 2, but to Murder in Cold blood. You obviously didn’t know Bernadette to describe her as Sweet. How is sweet referred to Murder? To bad Kirsten didn’t get a chance to grow up and grow out of it. She’s the Victim. Not you’re so called Sweet friend Bernie.
Oh please bet you were t any better. I’m sure you were a big Smart Aleck. Kirsten wasn’t Super Rich like Melrose Place, family was well off, so was Bernadette’s. That Movie was nothing like the real Kirsten. Kirsten was Cute and so funny and bouncy and full of energy and Life. She called Bernadette on her bizarre behavior that night, and if Bernadette would of left Kirsten alone, it would of never reached that Point, and Kirsten would still be alive maybe even today. Bernadette chased her. As for the Shoes one time comment. Kirsten and Bernadette were both friendly and nice girls. That Movie had Tori Spelling kind of a Bully. Even so, I said before, and I’ll say it again, still no excuse to murder.
Mats you knew Kirsten? Did you know the other 2 girls that were accused? Nancy and Joanna? I heard on here Joanna was bullied bad, so were quite a few others. One girl here posted that one girl accused Football players of Sexual Assault at a Party and she was driven out of that School also. Another DJ initials it was said she was bullied relentlessly as well. Kirsten was a Bully, I had heard she was,, and heard she wasn’t and it was hard to picture her as a Bully. Some say she was Stuck up, but not a Bully. Regardless she didn’t deserve to die, and she isn’t the only one who laughed at people in High School. She would of grown out of that. Who is Ms Bunch? Also McDonald I heard of her on these sites. That other gal said Kirsten was Sweet that knew her. Several on the site say Kirsten was Sweet Cute and Funny. They told about the girls ran out of School. To much detailed stuff if you ask me. It was to Personal.
So Mats Bernadette was Sweet. She killed a girl. Don’t matter if the girl bullied her. She should of just beat her up, that would of stopped her. Killing is going to far. This Mats person you’re either Bernadette, or sister, or a very good friend. So you’re justifying Murder due to bullying? If Bernadette was so Sweet, why did she watch 2 girls take the blame? She would of never Confessed but FBI got involved, and were closing in on her. Kirsten May of had moments and been a Stuck up person, but that don’t Justify murdering her. Lots of teen girls are caddy and laugh at people. Like Missy Availa saying she was roughish and wild and Loose, didn’t give Karen Severson and Laura Doyle any right to murder her either. One person said Missy was mean and a bully and she bullied them bad well that person and you are the same, Justifying Murder cause someone was mean, or Stuck up. Not saying Kirsten and Missy were Saints, but we all Bully and been Bullied. Don’t matter if those 2 were mean and Bullies, no right to murder them, that went to far. If every teen girl was to be murdered due to bullying and being Stuck up, and also Loose with boys then we wouldn’t have any teen,girls at all. There’s other Measures to take other than Murder. If Kirsten was going to out Bernadette, she would of told Alex Arnold all about her, and the Conversation.
This Mats person you sound just like what Bernie’s BFF said about Kirsten exactly. Calling her a B and saying she dressed nice in an interview. Not saying it’s you, but a lot of Similarities. I read a lot of these Articles,and her BFF said the exact same thing on one interview.
Mats you knew those Girls? Did you know the 2 Accussed? I heard they ran Several girls out not just them, they Demonized one to where she had to Leave portraying her as a “Tramp” over some guys. Several girls in Interviews said they didn’t want to be found cause there years at Miramonte wasn’t the best. Miramonte sounds like it had its share of Bullying. But I heard both sides on Kirsten, some say she was a hugging person who liked everyone, like in the Interview of a friend of hers mom said she was a loveable Puppy. The Principal though highly of her. We all make remarks to people as teens even the best of people, we’re not perfect, but no right to Murder and it don’t Justify Murder. Bernadette couldn’t of been to nice, she Murdered and watched 2 girls take the blame knowing it took a toll on thier lives and Families. She slaughtered a girl. Besides if Kirsten was going to out her, she would of told Alex Arnold all about it on the drive home. She probaly wanted Bernadette to leave her alone that’s all. Kirsten would of long outgrown that before now, if she had of lived.
If Bernadette was so Sweet would of never murdered. So Kirsten was a Bully, no right to Justify Bernadette’s actions. I hear Kirsten was a Sweet Adorable girl, and I heard she was a Bully. We all had enemies and faults and all teen girls are Caddy and mean at some point, no reason to die, they outgrow it in adulthood, most do anyways, some never do. Still wasn’t right. Mira note ran a lot of girls out from what I read. Not just the 2 accussed. I heard also Kirsten was just Self Absorbed to, but not a Bully. I guess we all can’t like everyone. I heard from an article from her friends mom, Kirsten wasn’t exclusive and liked everyone. Maybe if Bernadette wouldn’t of chased her, she wouldn’t of had to of murdered her. Bernadette tried her best to forge a friendship under false pretenses and you Justify her actions, you must either be Bernadette or her sister, or a close friend or Relative.
Here we go again. You knew Kirsten. You the one telling about the Bullied girls who were accused of the Crime. and the one who was ran out of School for getting drunk at a Party and messing with ajocks? Also a DJ chick who was Singled out.Using McDonalds name sure she will appreciate it. Man you all just know Kirsten a small World. Again so many came on saying they knew Kirsten and sharing Personal Details on other girls there. Using friends names there, they altered her friends names for Privacy rights. Kirsten from my Understanding was Self Absorbed and a Snob, but not a Bully.
I’m sure you knew them all. (Lucky you). Kirsten’s family and Berns family were both Well off, Bern lived in a Richer part. You claim you know Kirsten, are you the one who told about the Bullied Girls who were ran out and Demonized. One got drunk at a Party you told about on here, and the others who were not Noticed and the 2 blamed. You’re the same one I bet. You named all of Kirsten’s friends. Well one mother of her friend on a blog told Kirsten was Exclusive and liked everyone. It was on the Murder still haunts Moraga Residents. So she had a different view of Kirsten, Bern wasn’t nice to of murdered. She slaughtered the girl. So glad you think she’s nice.
Well 1st off Kirsten’s home on Orchard Rd was nice, but no Mansion like the Movie portrays a nice Ranchstyle home. Berns home on La Espiral was Larger and more Expensive. Bern want the poor girl Deployed in the movie. Bern was more well off than a lot of people in the Neighborhood she grew up in. In order to get into the Bobbies you had to have money. So she had money, her family did. She wasn’t the Lonely girl with one friend, had Plenty of friends, was about as Popular as Kirsten was, just didn’t see it. Kirsten was Cute and funny from my Standpoint. As for knowing her Personally I didn’t, I know someone who did, she was Bubbly and full of Jokes and Laughs.
You are full of it. You are lying. Kirsten wasnt a bully. Self Absorbed yes. That dont Justify Murder. I know a gal who knew someone who knew Kirsten. Stuck up she was, no Bully. Youre either Bernadette or her Sister, or a Close friend like Berns BFF. I could call you out but I wont. Her BFF said the same exact thing abour Kirsten
Its possible its someone pretending to know Kirsten. Probaly the one who gave details on all those bullied girls at Miramonte. Giving our McDonalds name Dont prove you know them.
You are full of it. You are lying. Kirsten wasnt a bully. Self Absorbed yes. That dont Justify Murder. I know a gal who knew someone who knew Kirsten. Stuck up she was, no Bully. This girl lives in San Francisco and knows a person who knows someone who knew Kirsten. Shame on you calling a dead girl names. Like Missy Availa a girl said Missy was the meanest girl she ever met, and her worst bully ever. Shes no better than you. Even if Missy and Kirsten were Bullies bo reason to Murder them. Missy was more toughish than Kirsten that took no crap. Missy didnt start fights just stood her ground. I read alot om her to. Kirsten was just Stuck up, but not a mean girl. Shame on you.
What a Fantasy.
Sticking up for a Murderer youre Pathetic. Kirsten never got to Cheer, go to Prom, Graduate or go on to College. You need help.
Talking peoples business again, McDonald may not like her name being used. She has a right to Privacy. You the one who told about the girls ran out of Miramonte as well. Oh I’m sure they so love having thier names and business displayed for the World to see. It’s not about them, it’s all about Kirsten who,was,robbed of her life, and robbed from her family. You’re not looking at that Situation. We don’t care how mean she was,:sure you weren’t so much a Saint yourself at Miramonte. You’re not now Bullying a dead girl, makes you worse than her, you will be the one to Answer for it, not her, she already has, Bernadette sure isn’t any Angel she’s a Cold Blooded Killer, don’t care what her reasons are, she is the Bully, and Kirsten is the Victim. The 2 blamed girls were Victims, so how dare you! No justification for Murder. This is Berns BFF or her Sister or Bern herself, no one else would go to such extend to call a dead girl names. It sounds like something Berns BFF called Kirsten, that or Virginia Protti, it is someone close to Bern.
Mats Above a girl is dead, as a result from the girl who had a Sweet Melancholy. So she was a Bully, she is not here to defend herself any longer, so you’re the Bully now. I guess Bullying Justifies Murder, the way you’re putting it, Kirsten is the real Vicitm, not Bernadette. You’re not getting that, let Kirsten Rest In Peace. The girl who said Missy Availa was the meanest girl she ever knew and was her Worst Bulky, you’re no better, let the dead rest.
As I said, Kirsten was Conceited, and Stuck up, but not no Bully. A lot of girls are Conceited, don’t mean they deserved to be Murdered. You Mats that knows Kirsten, why was she so Mean? Bernadette chased her, tailgated her home when Alex Arnold took her home, if Bernadette hadn’t of bothered her, she wouldn’t of bothered Bernadette, she didn’t have to like Bern, and she didn’t owe Bern a thing. So that’s not bullying, that’s rejecting you, cause she knew Bern was off beat. So you are offbeat to, for defending a Killer. Kirsten was SelfAbsorbed not mean and bullish.
Paris Mahone, did you even know Kirsten? How do you know she was a mean girl? I didn’t know her, but had a friend who’s Facebook friend did. I hear she was Caddy and Stuck up, I don’t even know if that’s true, but she wasn’t a Bully. She could of been real nice and friendly. Most Cheerleaders are friendly, but kind of Stuck up as well, and picky about thier friends. Kirsten May of been just like that, I couldn’t tell you that’s true. Did you go to School with Kirsten and really know her? Or going by the Movie portrayed, Deadly Women had Kirsten as a down to Earth Girl who loved all. Like I said, I wasn’t there, but if she was Bullying Bernadette, why didn’t Bernadette just beat her up and whip on her good? That way she would of learned and been afraid, no she took the Coward Way out and Murdered, and Bernadette was chasing after Kirsten. Kirsten probaly spotted she wasn’t all there and was going to out her on it. Setting up a fake meeting and lying about a Party is Strange and Weird. She should of told the truth and met Kirsten at the house and talked there with her parents present.
Bernadette is a physchopath and a Killer, and always will be. She may live a Quiet life, but she is still a Killer. Anyone who defends her is just as Sick and Twisted as she is. Sweet Melancholy my tail. A Murderer, So Kirsten was a Snob, a lot of ppl are, the way she died,was Horrific. So bullies need to die. Bernadette will never escape her Image of what people have of her, no matter how Nice she becomes. Same for Karen Severson and Laura Doyle theyre cold blooded killers to, Missy was Kirsten’s age, this happened not long after Kirsten was Murdered. Missy was Described as a Bully and Very Mean also. Still no one deserves to die. But to say Bernadette was a Sweet girl. She couldn’t of been or she never would of killed, and watch the town accuse 2 Innocent girls and harrass,them over it. So no she is a Psychopath. I hear Bernadette was Snooty also as Snooty as Kirsten. She was mean and Stuck up also. If you weren’t Popular she looked down on you just as bad as Kirsten did. It just became a War between the 2 which one was better, and Kirsten was, and Bernadette wanted to be, and Kirsten was in her way. So Mats read the Definition Sweet, it doesn’t line up,with Murder. This is Berns BFF I’ll bet. She called Kirsten names. Kirsten was described mostly Vibrant and friendly by others, and so was Bernadette. Everyone has an Opinion guess we will never know unless we truly knew them, and not Berns friends or Sisters who Comment bad stuff about Kirsten, of course they won’t tell the true facts. So the Mats either you’re Berns Sisters, Berns BFF, or even Bern herself.
Kirsten was also described as Cute, funny and full of Life, and Bern took that Life. So she is a Horrible girl. Yes Kirsten May of been Snooty, but she was also adorable to those who knew her. Even a Mother of one of her friends said, Kirsten was like a Puppy and hugged people,,not exclusive and liked everyone. I was told she had no known enemies. If Kirsten wanted to smoke pot, Bern would of esp. as bad as she wanted her friendship. Kirsten was very Popular, but there were a few a little more Popular, why didn’t Bern go after them and befriend them, the girls on Homecoming Court, and in the Atlantis Club. She had a Childhood friend who was Popular, wonder she didn’t go after her, and kill her, like Karen Severson. If it hadn’t of been Kirsten, it’d been her childhood friend, or someone else, cause Bern has Jealousy Issues. Could of been any of those girls in that group as one girl said, they were all like Kirsten in lots of ways.
Kirsten wasn’t a Bully. She was friendly, but kind of Arrogant as well. She only had Certain friends. She didn’t Bully Bernadette, Just was irritated cause she lied to her, and her mom about the Party, and all. Kirsten was mostly nice to Everyone, so she had a few people she didn’t like, we all have. If we all got along with everyone then it would be boring. I know there were problems beteewn she and Nancy Kane, and that other blamed girl.
Bernadette is still a Pathetic Loser, and always will be. Anyone who defends her and likes her is a Pathetic Loser also. Karma is catching up with her, that’s why she has all these haters and has to watch her back anywhere she goes. It’s all coming back to haunt her for what she did. Don’t care how mean Kirsten was, that was uncalled for, you that defend Bernadette saying Kirsten was mean girl, do you realize Kirsten is gone forever, and will never be back, do you realize Bernadette took a Life! What is wrong with you? We know Bernadette has issues, you that like her and defend her have Issues as well. God calls people home not Bernadette. She’s still a Murderer and will never be anything but, as long as she’s Alive, I won’t forgive her for it, and neither will Kirsten’s family and friends. I forgive her to a degree, but won’t accept what she did to Kirsten, she will live with that the rest of her life. I see why her Sisters and mom forgive her, theyre her family and family sticks by you. Even her childhood BFF can’t forgive her for such a Horrible Act, if it was drugs or Alcohol she was I. Trouble for or Stealing maybe we could look past that. Not when she robbed a girl in the Spring of her life, and robbed her of a Family, graduating from High School, and Marrying a nice man, and whatever she planned to become in the future, Bernadette took it all from her.
Bernadette killed Kirsten out of Jealousy, not Bullying. I knew Kirsten she was funny and adorable. Yes at times maybe she was Snippy, but we’re teens, who isn’t! The boys at Miramonte liked Bernadette’s childhood friend and Kirsten, none were interested in Bernadette. To a degree Bernadette struggled harder than most of her friends, she wasn’t as Popular as they were and was a little of an Outcast, but Tolerated. Bernadette only got in that Exclusive Club cause a friend who had pull nominated her. The guys did reject her, and that insensed her “inferiority”and “self esteem. No reason for Murder cause someone is what you aren’t, or ever will be. Her friends were all Pretty. Kirsten didn’t really Bully Bernadette, some of the other girls there did Bully her a little. A couple of them did, Bern just looked the other way. Guys just didn’t really notice her.
That Mats Chick don’t know her head from her Butt. Bernadette lived in a bigger house than Kirsten, and family had just as much money as the Costas family, if not more. Google It, it sure will tell you. Kirsten and Bernadette were both well off. Movie portrayed Kirsten as a Snotty girl, when really she was just down to Earth and Vivacious and fun Loving. She just got irritated cause Bernadette lied to her and lured her out under false Circumstances, I’d be annoyed and Angry to. I can’t picture Kirsten being Mean or Rude, so hard to picture that one. We all have a breaking point. Bernadette pushed her by her false Alibies. Kirsten May of been Stuck up and Caddy, most teen girls are, but she got along with almost everyone, she got along with Bernadette at first, till Bernadette kept trying to be her friend. So she didn’t like Joanna or Nancy, she isn’t Obligated to, or owe them anything. Kirsten was a true Social Butterfly, always joking with others, talking with others, We weren’t friends but I liked Kirsten and all those girls. I wasn’t Popular and Kirsten liked me and was nice to me. She didn’t make fun of people like that Mats girl claimed, probaly Bernadette’s BFF commenting or Virginia or Bernadette herself, truth be told, cause Kirsten wasn’t a thing like that Stacy Lockwood in the Movie. She was more Bubbly and down to Earth. I never seen her make fun of anyone, of course, I wasn’t around her that much, but she was friendly and nice. Bernadette was nice to, but she had hidden obsessions. Some thought Bernadette was Stuck up, there were a few that thought she was to. She did have money, don’t let that other Mats tell you any different. She also had nice clothes, her problem was with Kirsten, that Kirsten was reaching the top, where Bernadette wanted to reach the top. Also Bernadette wasn’t bullied or singled out, that’s BS. Kirsten always showed off her cheers, she was proud. She and one of her good friends practiced all the time. Most cheerleader s are friendly, and yes at the same time, kind of stuck up, to a degree, they only run with certain groups, but they will say hello to you, and help you if you need it. Kirsten’s favorite game was Nancy Drew, and she loved her cheers to. In swimming pools she would practice tumbling, one friend told about it, she would dive in the water and do back flips. Rest In Peace Kirsten.
Kirsten loved playing Nancy Drew, she and her friends were crazy, I would tell them, I got to put up with you guys today. LOL. They laughed, I think Kirsten was only teasing Nancy and Joanna they didn’t mean any harm with it. I don’t think they meant any harm at all, and as for the prank calls, they were probaly only fooling around, Nancy would take it all wrong, and say things back thinking it was a personal attack my standpoint. Nancy was Sweet, she just took things the wrong way. There were a lot of girls at Miramonte they didn’t like or fit in, they ran them all out, not just Nancy, she wasn’t alone, neither was Joanna, but they act like they were the only victims there. Kirsten has nothing to do with thier problems at Miramonte or any of her friends had anything to do with it, so where is it you’re all getting Kirsten and her friends ran these girls out. Some of these girls ( not Nancy or Joanna) acted like Hoes, and ppl don’t take kindly to that. If the ones acting like Hoes were demonized while everyone lived happily ever after, why were they demonized. They obviously made some bad decisions and there’s repurcussions for your poor decisions, that’s not Kirsten’s fault, you mad that decisions, not Kirsten. Bernadette made a horrible decision by ending a girls life, if she left her alone, B wouldn’t be in the mess she got herself in, she kept pushing for her friendship. Bernadette shoukd of just acknowledged Kirsten was around and spoke Civil to her, without forging the friendship. She killed her cause she was afraid Kirsten would target her as a Weirdo now she’s labeled as a “MURDERER
. A label she will never ever get rid of, no matter how nice she becomes. You can’t go back in time. But Miramonte was what you made of it, I wasn’t Popular, but I got along esp, with Kirsten and her group. They weren’t as bad as you think. Normal teenagers they like I said, “were crazy” so to speak, and meant no harm towards Nancy and them, just harmless teasing, they were crazy like that. Kirsten teased Joanna and Joanna got it all wrong to. She never meant harm, as for Bernadette, Kirsten sometimes teased her, and she would be nice to her to, she just was angry for being lured out under false pretense to attend a so called party, and when Bernadette told her feeling about Kirsten, it freaked her out, she spotted something immediately, and she was right. Kirsten was a hugging person and went around joking, she would tease all of us, it was harmless. So people got the wrong view of her saying she was a Bully. She may of been “Stuck up” most Cheerleaders are, but she was no where near a Bully or made fun of people. It was more harmful teasing that she meant nothing by.
As for the girls acting like Hoes if they have PTSD from it maybe they should of thought of the consequences, before they did it. They went to parties or ran off with guys, guys had no right to take advantage of them, yes it was wrong, but they put themselves in that situation to where it could of been prevented. Yes the guys should of paid for it, but the Judicial System is funny that way, unfortunately the girls paid for it. That wasn’t right, but when you run loose people think you’re asking for it. That still wasn’t Kirsten’s fault. I don’t even think she was there when that all went down. I thought Miramonte was a nice place, if you make good decisions myoumwill make it (popular or not). I wasn’t a cheerleader at all, I was in some clubs at school,( not Bobbies or Atlantis) but Spanish.
You are one OBSESSED weirdo. You get on here and write comments all day long, repeating yourself over and over and over again. Shut up already and get a life. I’m still scrolling through your crazed obsession. And for the love of Pete, it’s would HAVE, should HAVE, and could HAVE. I can tell it’s you before I even read the first line.
Repeats itself, repeats itself, repeats itself, ugh.
Hahaha. Love it 👍👍😘
Bernadette was Shady then, shady now. Don’t let that sweet innocent act fool you. She watched 2 girls take the blame and did absolutely nothing about it. She only confessed cause the FBI was cornering her, and she had no where to turn to. It was only a matter of time before she d get caught so she came forth. Kirsten was angry for her lying to get her out under false pretenses, and she knew something was off. Bernadette had it all planned, if Kirsten didn’t give her the response she hoped for, she was planning to kill her. It had nothing to do with “Bullying “ wasn’t even about that, it was about forging a friendship. Bernadette will loose it again if she lost it once. She has Mental issues and always will. Always had also. She was jealous of Kirsten and wanted to be everything Kirsten was, but could’ nt so she killed her. Bernadette was not a nice girl, if she was then she’d never of killed Kirsten, she’d left her alone and went on. Like I said, Bernadette is shady. Don’t trust someone like that.
To anyone that wishes to support Kirsten’s memory, and believes Kirsten didn’t deserve what happened to her, please have a look at, and join her Facebook Memorial Page. All are welcome. Here is the link: https://www.facebook.com/kirstenmarina.costas.9
Let’s make it a great Memorial for Kirsten. She deserves it. Admin Garret.
Bernadette is a “Pig”. She is evil and a Monster (with a very dark Soul). Who can’t see that part? No excuse for what she did, BTW she was not the poor White trash the Movie deployed her to be, she had a nice home, and was just as well off as Kirsten’s family, ‘lived on the better side of town.’ So don’t feel Sorry for her. Kirsten had an ‘Engaging ‘ type Personality, that Movie was off, and (Pro Bernadette). Those who say Kirsten was a Mean Girl clearly didn’t know her, or she didn’t like them with (good Reasons). I didn’t know either girl, but there are people who knew them both, they were both described as Sweet, Kirsten was more Outgoing, and Bernadette was more shyer. I live in LA and know people on the Bay Area that know all about the case, and know people who knew Kirsten, and they say the Movie was “offbeat”far from Kirsten’s Personality. So those who say she was a real mean girl, don’t know, cause I heard differently. Probally Berns Relatives saying all that, or, very close friends. She was not any Chris Hargensen in Carrie, or Regina George in Mean Girls or anything like that, she was totally down to Earth and engaging from what I was told.
I have to agree some, I was there, Kirsten was Cocky at times, no means a “Bully” just self absorbed. She was Popular, and, she was also nice at times, she just was “Stuck on herself”. Bernadette was a Snob also, she only wanted to hang with the incrowd, if you were nothing she didn’t talk to you anymore than she had to. I got the impression they were both Stuckup ( Bernadette and Kirsten) they were friends to. They hung out together, Bernadette couldn’t face up Kirsten was more Popular than she was, and better at everything. I didn’t hate either one, maybe they were Misunderstood, as for being “Stuckup”. I never wished for Kirsten to die like she did, that was horrible. I didn’t really know her, just who she was, same for Bernadette. That was 36 years ago, and the Memory still lingers on. We all have moved on, and went on with our Lives since that tragic episode.
Anyone still get on these sites? What about it’s about time, the one who knew Kirsten? Where are you these days? Don’t let this Corona Virus stop you? It’s about time on other sites told all about Kirsten and how much fun loving she was. Bernadette is a Weirdo as Kirsten spotted, this wasn’t about Bullying, it was about being called out in front of the School, and tarnishing her reputation, which in the long run it did. I hear Kirsten was Beautiful inside and out. Maybe others didn’t think so, but to many said she was. So she didn’t like everybody who does? We all have someone we don’t like, and we won’t be liked by everybody. No right to Murder a person. How many teen girls don’t get Smart Aleck, it’s a normal part of a teens life. If we had to kill all 15:year olds who were Smart Aleck then we wouldn’t have none making it to Graduation or getting their Drivers License. Boys are Smart Aleck also, girls are Worse at it. Teenage years are hard on all of us. To much pressure is put on us, but we don’t murder because of it.
Joe Kosla, where are you? You said your Sister was a friend of both girls? Wish someone would come back on here and tell us more about it. I’m sure Kirsten had her moments, no right to be Savagely Murdered. Joe she must of liked your Sister. Was Kirsten and her friends a lot of fun to hang with, and did they party? I hear one girl partied a lot that hung with them. Teens are teens. What happened to a lot of those girls fro Kirsten’s group? I hear a lot of them still get together on Occasions, and others have moved on.
Kirsten, and D and Ms Stuff were the Life of a Party. I’m sure today Ms. Stuff, D and Beauty and the Beast could still be the life of the Party if they wanted to be. So could LP, I hear she don’t get around much to to many places anymore, she’s not in California. I hope she’s not sick esp. with this Virus going around. They were all fun gals to be around. And Im sure Ms.Stuff and D and Beauty and the Beast are probaly still today If they want to be. LP even if she doesn’t get around to much to see people, I’m sure there’s a purpose in her life to. I just hear she stays mostly to herself and don’t see much of former classmates. She’s on the East Coast last I heard, I hear she’s fine health wise, and some say she wasn’t feeling well awhile back, not sure why, she’s mellowed out a lot through the years. Like I said, I’m sure there’s a purpose somewhere to where she can make a difference in someone’s life today, she was a lot like Kirsten Costas.
LP was a lot like Kirsten. She looked like Kirsten with her curly hair, and the Life of the Party like Kirsten. Like I said, Ms.Stuff, D and Beauty and the Beast, today could be the Life of the Party if they wanted to be. I’m sure at Reunions they are. Kirsten was the real life of the Party! She loved life, never seen her get ugly with anyone, I really can’t picture that. I wasn’t in the Popular, but those girls still talked to me and was friendly with me. We all were in Gymn together we weren’t really friends, but we got along and talked and hung out in Gymn. Kirsten was always joking around. She and D were always cracking jokes and having fun. So whoever said Kirsten was mean, and was a B I can’t picture that, I didn’t know her very well either, we all have a mean side, I never seen it in her. Bernadette was kind to. She was Strange to. She just acted Odd a lot. She could be mean, in fact, I could see her getting mean before I could see Kirsten. She and her BFF were both Odd. Bernadette’s BFF.
Beauty and the Beast and D are still the Life of a Party at times, esp Reunions. As for LF aka LP she just disappeared off the map somehow. That part of LPs life is over with I guess. She don’t go hardly anywhere anymore. But those others today are still a lot of fun. Kirsten would probaly still be today to if she was still alive.
With all this Corona Virus going around, none of that matters, it was 36 years ago, maybe LP or whoever moved on with her life. She may be dead by now or have this bad Virus. If not, I doubt she worries about the past. This Virus is killing all the World over, esp. people aren’t to worried about this case any longer. Maybe LP doesn’t want to be the Life of the party. She is In her 50 s now, that’s if she’s alive. And those others, D and them, they have lives of their own and probaly (jobs and families) so why would they care about being the “ Life of the Party”? Maybe you need (a Life of your own).
Get a Life please. Then you wouldn’t be worrying g about these people being the “Life of the Party”. Worry about this Virus that is killing people Worldwide.
With this Virus, and now George Floyd, ( and the Riotings all over) I’m deeply surprised people still are discussing Bernadette Protti on here, and “other sites”. People in Orinda aren’t worried about this so much anymore, for all over the World were in times of need and Sorrow. Kirsten’s friends don’t sit and discuss “Morbid depressing” stuff to start with. They’re not up with “Morbid fascinations” due to all the stuff that is going on Worldwide today. So yes Kirsten’s friends still get together at times, but they don’t discuss Bernadette or the death of Kirsten, as a matter of fact,( they don’t want it brought up at all). I can’t tell you if every single one of them get together, I know lots do. You would have to contact her friends personally for any information on who gets together or doesn’t, I personally don’t know, and even if I did I wouldn’t tell it on here and name them off, that is invading Privacy. If they want it known they will come forth themselves and tell it or contact you.
It’s best not to post comments at all on Bernadette anymore. I just read on You tube on her recipe Video where she is sick now. She doesn’t leave her house hardly at all anymore. If you want to know what is wrong with her get on her YouTube channel where she makes pies. I’m not sure she’s really sick, I just hear she is, and doesn’t leave her home hardly. She supposedly suffers from depression. I’m sure she does, look at her life, and where she’s been, and how the media harasses her, not saying she don’t deserve it, which she does, but if she is sick, then leave her alone. She is unstable and who knows what she will do. She killed once. She is Crazy obviously, has enough problems and has to deal with murdering Kirsten and that doesn’t help. She is paying for it like they said in her chess pie recipe. She is still Crazy as always.
If Bernadette isn’t depressed it would be a Miracle. No one is bothering her anymore. To much at stake in the World than to be worrying about something that happened decades ago. Is she really sick, (or is this just something they came up with).? Well it is best to not bother the girl anymore “sick or not”, cause she moved on and so did the Costas family, so why keep the fuel burning, it’s just best to let folks live their lives. Like you said, “ she is paying for it” and has been for years. The future is right around the corner, it’s a waste to go after someone cause the law didn’t do their job. There’s way to much in Life than to be spending it chasing someone around over 30 years ago the justice system failed, it’s just pointless. And yes Bernadette has enough problems, and there’s Virus out there Worldwide that is killing people all over, and Rioters rioting in streets keeping the Virus alive, that is what the World needs to focus on today.
this is one reason that I really have a hard time with lifetime movies. it’s very frustrating when the characters are not truly depicted in an accurate manner. I knew nothing about this story until I saw it on lifetime and I actually felt really sorry for Kelly Martin who portrayed Bernadette protti. Tori spelling who actually played Kristen Costas was so incredibly unlikable on screen that she almost felt as though she deserved what she got. from what I have read on different blogs from kids that actually went to school with both these girls they have said that this movie did not accurately portray either one of the girls and that’s very frustrating for people who watch the movie and find themselves empathizing with the wrong person. I certainly don’t condone murder under any circumstances even if someone is being bullied but I certainly think it is a terrible thing to actually do a movie that is based on true events without any detail to the accuracy of the characters.
John Grisham, Kirsten was nothing like Tori Spelling at all. She was Bubbly and Gregarious, loved to have a “great time“. Bernadette was a Sociopath and stalked her, and dwelled on her for Months about Kirsten “not liking her” when in fact Kirsten had nothing against Bernadette till that “Fateful Night”. I can’t even begin to picture Kirsten even acting halfway like Tori Spelling did, in the new Movie the Kirsten portrayed wasn’t as bad, but I don’t think Kirsten was like that either. Well she had her Spirits and was funny ( if not funnier) like that. Kirsten loved to joke and tell funny jokes to. Not saying she was an Angel, I’m sure she said something to hurt Someone’s feelings, who hasn’t! I am almost certain she and Bernadette had words it’s Obvious, but Kirsten got in the Car with her, Kirsten didn’t have anything against Bernadette, Bernadette took it way to Personal till it became Personal and (fatal). I have never seen Kirsten insult anyone, (I knew her), she was friendly towards everybody, Berns BFF May say it differently, cause Bernadette just took things way to Serious, and like I said she took things way to Personal to “where it became Personal”. I knew there were girls who didn’t like Kirsten not sure why, we all can’t get along with everybody. That Movie was truly (one sided) and people are just going by off that Movie, and maybe Kirsten did say some mean things to other People, but who hasn’t! Who can walk a straight line and never say one un kind word ever, w all make mistakes, and most teen girls do get Caddy at times that’s just Normal, but we outgrow it. But to portray her as a Mean girl teen is off limits to the real Kirsten. Everybody who knew her just loved her “ well most everybody”.
John even if Kirsten was as mean as Tori Spelling (which BTW she wasn’t) that is still no right to Murder her. Kirsten really wasn’t big enough to be a “Bully” and she was more into Social things and School Spirit than bullying others. She loved School. She always loved Cheerleading. Deadly Women portrayed Kirsten differently, she was kind of like that, but cut up more and more bouncier. That girl on Deadly Women who portrayed Kirsten was almost perfect, watch Landscape Suicide and they show a girl portraying Kirsten talking on the phone and laughing listening to Music, that is the closest to Kirsten Costas that can be described the best. Landscape Suicide 1986 is the closest after Bernadette’s interview with the Police it shows it. Kirsten was almost identical to that, no like Tori Spelling.
Kirsten was nice, yeah, she and a few she didn’t like, but they were the kids “no one liked”. That’s a different situation, no one liked those other kids as well. They were weird and odd mostly, I didn’t like them myself. But for the most part Kirsten got along with mostly everyone. Bernadette was sweet, can’t imagine her even capable of something like Murder, but she was. Lots of Students had to seek Counseling that year over all this. Things were never the same after all that, it was a horrible experience, one good friend was “dead” and another friend was her killer, it was to much for us to take in and swallow. Can’t imagine what feelings the Costas family had either. Kirsten didn’t like some of those people cause they rubbed her the wrong way and acted Stupid around her, she definately wasn’t down with Stupidity.
Art and Berit were Wonderful people. They were always so nice to all of us (Kirstens friends) and I have fond memories of them, enjoyed thier home, nice home, and BTW Kirsten’s house wasn’t any Mansion, it was beautiful Ranch home with a nice back yard, and Bernadette’s house was just as nice as Kirsten’s if not nicer,
I never understood why Bernadette killed Kirsten. She was described as a nurturer in an episode of Killer Kids. Nurturers don’t kill people.
Sorry about that. I got cut off before I had a chance to say anything else. If Kirsten was so mean, why didn’t Bernadette just stay away from her? Even if Kirsten was mean, it still doesn’t justify killing her. It seemed like Bernadette needed intense psychotherapy for her issues.
Karen, it wasn’t about Bullying, it was over jealousy issues. Here’s what I think happened, Bernadette wanted Kirsten’s approval badly cause everyone else had Kirsten’s approval and Bernadette became dangerously obsessed over the whole deal, and she invited Kirsten out that night to make friends, and I think she said something to her that went horribly wrong to Kirsten, like make a clumsy pass at her and it terrified Kirsten, and Kirsten threatened to expose it to everyone, and Bernadette just “freaked out” and it possible she just found the knife by chance and got scared that a secret was going to be revealed, so she went to scare her, and maybe she didn’t mean to kill her, but she meant to harm her (that’s a fact). Nevertheless Kirsten will never be with us again, and there was no sense in murder (premeditated ) or not, it still happened. She should of just left Kirsten alone and went on with other things, Kirsten wouldn’t of gave her any thought otherwise, but she was just obsessed with Kirsten and Kirsten liking her, that was the main focus in her life, and it took Kirsten’s unfortunately. Kirsten was a (down to earth) girl and she had a few she didn’t like, esp. if you came at her the wrong way like Bernadette did, or kids no one else liked cause they were so annoying to be around. Bernadette was a sweet girl, that’s why it was so hard to beleive she was the killer. It put a huge impact on our lives, first dealing with the loss of Kirsten, then finding out a girl we all trusted was the one responsible, that is something g that scattered our lives. We were never the same after that, Miramonte was never the same after that.
Kirsten was the “life of the party”. She was so cute and funny, and loved to be around friends have so much fun. She mostly liked everybody. She loved to play Nancy Drew. She had a slumber party on her 15 th BD we all snuck into a pool and swam, (a fun night) and to bad she didn’t get to celebrate her 16th Birthday, Art and Berit planned on taking us all to a Hotel and spend the night. Kirsten had a lot to look forward to. Bernadette was popular to, she was just wanting to be Kirsten, and Kirsten’s approval meant so much to us all, Kirsten didn’t have anything against Bernadette till that fateful night, She never cared either way, Bernadette took it so serious and it became (serious) and fatal. If she would of left her alone, Kirsten wouldn’t of ever bothered her, those TV movies Kirsten wasn’t nothing like Tori Spelling, in the 2nd movie a little maybe she was like that girl, but more funnier. Kirsten she had her moments there was a few she didn’t like, as I said, it was ones that no one else liked. She wasn’t a fan of stupidity or annoyance, or someone rubbed her the wrong way, she let them know. Tell me someone who is nice to every single person in the world and likes every single person in the world, if they do let me meet them. We all have someone we don’t like. We all as teens said something smart to someone or hurt someones feelings. That’s teens for you, it’s tough being a teen, most of them are smart alecky at some time or another, but we outgrow it. The ones no one else liked there’s a reason usually. They made it they’re choice to, like doing stupid stuff all the time. Kirsten was one to always have fun, Was Orinda elite, yes, but they had a lot of wonderful people there to, and they helped one another. People who grew up in Orinda and say it’s snobs we’re mostly people who weren’t socially accepted growing up, and they made choices that others didn’t make and cussed and talked dirty and skipped school and always in trouble, and hung out with outcasts, and they became outcasts by association. Others didn’t want any part of them cause Orinda kids want to be liked and accepted, and if you hang out with kids who aren’t you make yourself and outcast to.
Karen I believe on that “fateful night” In The car Bernadette was pushing a friendship was was adamant and persistent about it. I believe she made a fool out of herself begging and crying to Kirsten about how she feels no one likes her ( which wasn’t the true case then) and was kept repeatedly begging to Kirsten to be her (friend) and made a complete fool out of herself and it just freaked Kirsten out and scared her. I believe she kept crying and begging for her friendship and it weirded Kirsten out. That’s my belief. Cause Kirsten was friends with most people who were (popular) and Bernadette wanted to be included in that “so badly.”. I just believe Bernadette pushed to hard on Kirsten and it weirded out. she threatened to tell everyone at school the next day, she didn’t tell Alex Arnold ( the Man who drove her home) again it was to insane he probaly would of freaked and she didn’t want to scare him with the details. As I said, it’s possible Bernadette snapped and found the knife by chance; but if she hadn’t of been so aggressive towards Kirsten to be her friend, she wouldn’t of needed that knife. I’d been weirded out to. Bernadette had plenty of other friends, she was in that group, Kirsten didn’t have anything against Bernadette, if she would of left her alone, eventually they may of became friends, no she couldn’t wait, wanted it all right now and pushed and forced her way into it.
Kirsten wouldn’t give you the time of day especially if you weren’t in her (group). True if no one liked you she didn’t either she was nasty to some people. people no one else liked she was to quite a few and hurt their feelings, she didn’t want to associate with the bottom feeders at all, still no excuse for murder. She and her friends were mostly ( stuck up) and self absorbed, She wasn’t typically a bully just more snooty, at least that’s how she appeared to me. We weren’t in the same grade I was one year ahead of her she acted as if she was better. Only talked to her once or twice ever. She wasn’t mean or that just high maintenance. Bernadette was stuck up also or appeared to be. I only talked to
her a few times she was kind of uppity also like Kirsten. They were friends from what I seen, they traveled in the same group and walked together with them. I just think Bernadette had underlying issues and pressure on her to get to the top, but that was no right for murder. I wasn’t crazy about Kirsten Carrie, Christine and the rest, I knew how
they all were, taking a life is unacceptable and inexcusable. You have those girls in all schools, you just go on and leave them be, and hang with your own friends. Yes Kirsten and them all thought they were better than a lot. her friends portray her as an Angel of course they do, but she did make snide remarks to people who weren’t like her. I think Kirsten was friends with Bernadette or she would of never gotten in her car, Kirsten was funny who she associated with. She was nice to her friends though. Those girls like Chris she hung with has changed, they’re not like they were in school, Kirsten would of changed also as she got older.
Here’s what I think came down, the 2 girls had an argument and Bernadette was afraid she would of been kicked out of the (Bobbies) and excluded from that group. Kirstens friends who said she was nice, well they were all in some (Clique) and stuck together and helped one another out. Bernadette was afraid she would end up in the outside looking in ( which finally became the case) she took drastic measures to try and prevent it. Those girls aren’t that way as I said, they still get together on Occasion and all and are fine Adult Women. This will always be a tragic story that will never be forgotten, I certainly never wanted that to happen to Kirsten or anyone,she was a daughter, sister and friend to many.
I was in the artsy and nerd group to. I had an English class with Kirsten and her friends, we were all put in pairs in order to read off as part of a project, Kirsten and them just acted as though I was invisible and everyone in our group (but me) got to read a part. Other outsiders felt like they were excluded from her group to. Yes the Homecoming Queen said nice things about Kirsten, but she was at the (top) and Kirsten liked those people. Thier homecoming Queen was friendly and always spoke to people. I just felt like I didn’t fit in at Miramonte or Orinda. Maybe they were misunderstood, I didn’t hate any of them, I just got the feeling they looked down on me, and didn’t feel as though I belonged. I liked Nancy Kane, she got tired of having to be something she wasn’t, they looked down on her well. Bernadette May of been misunderstood to, I thought she was Snooty to.
I watched the movie again (both versions) and I have to agree with Miss Kiwi. You can’t force somebody to be friends with you. Bernadette really should have left her alone. I also noticed, in both movies, Bridget/Angela kept staring at Kelly/Stacy. It gave me the creeps. It was like she was obsessed with her, which she probably was. I’m sorry if I offended anybody here with my earlier comments.
Karen, it’s true, Bernadette was obsessed with “Kirsten “. It weirded Kirsten out. Whoever DD is of Kirsten and them didn’t like her, it’s cause she probably acted (Weird) around them. Kirsten liked almost everybody. She was friendly and outgoing. Kirsten didn’t like (stupidity). Every School has kids people don’t like! There’s usually a reason why. I always noticed Bernadette would give Kirsten stares and mean looks at times. She was obsessed with being liked and Kirsten not liking her. I never thought she would go as far as “murder”. Kirstens friendship meant so much to her, she would go on and on about it. Kirsten never gave Bernadette any thought. They were mutually aquatinted. The 2nd version of “ Death of a Cheerleader” is more like Kirsten to a degree. If you ever saw “ Saved by the Bell the new Class” Lindsey on that show reminded me a lot of what Kirsten was like. Google it and Season 1 thru 3 Lindsey is on there. She acted like Kirsten except Kirsten was (more funny). She has Kirstens demeanor. People who are spouting off on Kirsten are either Rejects, or friends or family of (Bernadette).
Also Karen, Kirsten favors Stacey Dash, with Lindsey Warner’s personality on “Saved by the Bell”. Kirsten was adorable. No other word. She hugged people all the time was a ( social butterfly). Can’t see her making fun of anyone. She as I said, didn’t want to be bothered with stupid acting people. That Dee if it is who I think she was always in trouble and never listened. I can see Kirsten not wanting to be bothered with her. Kirsten didn’t hate anyone, (as for Dee) she didn’t like the way she acted that’s all. She didn’t want to be bothered with her either. She talked to most people. She didn’t hate anyone (as I said) just didn’t like the way they acted. If Bernadette hadn’t of lied under false pretense she wouldn’t of been so mad at her. Bernadette was obsessed with her, a friend of ours, she thought Bernadette was “guilty”all along. Cause Bernadette was so obsessed with Kirsten liking her, she had some idea it was Bernadette, also Bernadette owned a “Pinto” same make as the car seen speeding away. GG was the mutual friend of Kirsten and Bernadette, GG doesn’t want anything to do with Bernadette again ever. Neither does a lot of former classmates.
I agree with Miss Kiwi, I believe Bernadette was dangerously obsessed with Kirsten. As for Kirsten making fun of outcasts, I agree every school has outcasts. Kirsten wasn’t obligated to helping those people, sometimes it has to be done on your own! I don’t see how Kirsten was worse than any teenage girl. I didn’t know her, but what teen girl isn’t sassy and smart aleck, but no reason to kill them, they grow out of it eventually. I’m sure Kirsten had her moments and faults and good qualities as well. Bernadette was far out of line I agree. I believe she made a clumsy pass at Kirsten, or said something weird, and Kirsten got all freaked. I read a lot of nice things about Kirsten as well, so she couldn’t of been all that bad. We aren’t all made to be popular. Kirsten was, and classmates mostly said she was a free fun spirit with a big heart and love for life. I do believe she called Bernadette weird and threatened to expose her weirdness’. I don’t go by Movies cause Movies dramatize the events to how they perceive it. It’s always so sad when a murder happens to anyone especially a young girl who has her whole life ahead of her. Kirsten’s future was right there in front of her staring her in the face, like the prom, graduation and deciding what College she would of been going to and getting married and having Children. That was all taken from her, so unfair. Bernadette should of gotten 25 to life for that Crime. The Judge felt sorry for her, and felt that the Community was using her trial as entertainment purposes and amusement.
Dee I don’t agree with you, so Kirsten and them had you on a project assignment and they didn’t include you in the circle, you ever thought maybe you gave signals you don’t belong, or why didn’t you ask them to allow you, people can’t read minds. I think you take things way to personal like Bernadette did, I believe MissKiwi Bernadette took things so serious that it became serious and a fatal obsession. How did you talk and act around those girls, ask yourself that! So they had a clique, what School or job doesn’t? Can’t blame Kirsten if you weren’t popular, maybe ask yourself why. People make their own reputation and choices in life whether they are bad or good. No one owes anyone a thing.
I personally beleive Kirsten could be a smart aleck to those she didn’t like, but remember most teenage girls are. Very few that aren’t. I do believe she was real nice to those she did like and her friends. It’s in a teen girls blood to be “Caddy and mean” it’s just normal, but that don’t give anyone the right to take someone else’s life. I believe Bernadette tried to friend her, and as I read and I do believe she acted on impulse, I believe she was just so enraged she snapped and did the (unthinkable). I believe Kirsten was going to out her for “being weird” and tell her weird conversation to her friends and put her at risk to be the butt of jokes. I think both girls were good girls, and I think one just got frustrated over a fake invitation, and I do believe Bernadette made a (butt) of herself to Kirsten, and it was all Kirsten could take. I believe the conversation was very bizarre to, about desperation of a friendship. Do I believe Kirsten was a Mean girl (bully) not at all, I believe she had those she didn’t like and may of been Snooty towards that got on her nerves. I don’t think she was any worse than any other teenage girl by any means. Do I believe she was (stuck up) to a degree I do, but aren’t most teen girls as I said before. As for Bernadette, do I believe she was a nice girl, yes I believe she was, but she became overly jealous that led her to rage and murder. I don’t think she intended to kill Kirsten, I believe she was desperate for a friendship and pushed to hard at it, and when she realized she made a fool out of herself, to became to much for her to handle and she did the (unthinkable). Kirsten was described as a cheerful girl by classmates, and I do believe for the most part, she got along with most her classmates and school mates. I do believe she didn’t like outcasts like Nancy and Joanna there. They probably rubbed her the wrong way, or got on her nerves somehow. I do believe she had some she didn’t like, (but who didn’t)! That don’t make her a terrible person cause she hand probaly only a handful she did t like. Remember teen girls will be teen girls, and they grow out of caddiness when they get older, but Kirsten never got that chance so so horrible. I even was smart alecky as a teen, it’s just something that takes over your mind and body. Same for guys as well, but girls are a lot worse.
I also believe Nancy and Joanna were nice girls that had thier moments also. I think the outcast girls there would say Kirsten was a (bully) chaise no one liked them, and they would say that. There were more than just Joanna that we’re singled out at Miramonte, I read other stuff there were quite a few that felt like they weren’t socially accepted.
I saw the film “Death of a Cheerleader” this January, 2021. I instantly knew it had to be a true-life story.
Firstly, Bernadette is an insentient and abhorrent human being. How could a teenager have been that diabolical? How? Changing your name does not change your being, by the way.
It’s patent that Bernadette had built-up animosity towards Kristen. I can’t assimilate anyone on the appearance to defend a so-called bullying. No single human being has the effrontery to kill a fellow human being; talk less of a supposed child.
I’m incandescent with rage. I’m irritated. I’m disgusted. I pray Bernadette is repayed and rewarded by the Blessed Trinity for the horrendous act towards the Costas.
Anyway, the past cannot be erased, rather we can learn from every instance and scenario. We should educate our children, our minds and our souls. “By education I mean an all-round drawing out of the best in the child and man; body, mind and spirit.” ~ Mahatma Gandhi.
I don’t think it was so much bullying as it was “insecurity”, I think Bernadette said something that went all wrong in the car. I think she confessed to Kirsten how she loved her and “wanted to be her” and it freaked Kirsten out. I think Kirsten probably threatened to tell everybody their bizarre conversation in the car that night. I heard Kirsten was self absorbed, but no bully. Even if she was, no right to murder her. Whether the murder was premeditated or not, no one can really determine that, still a young girl died at the hands of Bernadette Protti, and Bernadette will have to live with that the rest of her life. I just heard that Kirsten was “full of energy and life”. Regardless no one deserves to die like that. She had her whole life ahead of her, even if she was a smart aleck she would of grown out of it long before now. Most teen girls are smart alecky and mean. They grow out of it as they get older. By the time they’re 23 they grow out of it completely most ususally. Some by the time they’re 18 depends on the maturity level they’re at.
Whoever wrote this article is not being honest. Kirsten was in the class of 1986,
Even though she sadly didn’t live to see it. All of the pictures featured here are photos taken from newspapers, not the authors private collection. Kirsten was just like any other girl who had to go to that snobby school. Nobody was all that nice to each other because that was the culture… parents included even more so than the kids. I know this because I was there in the same class of Kirsten and Bernadette. Yes listen said something to Bernadette, not to her directly, about her ski equipment. Everyone talked a bunch of crap about each other, including Bernadette… who was just as rude and mean as any other girl there. Kirsten in no way deserved to die. She was a young girl, a funny, silly girl who could also be obnoxious. She was not in a “popular” group, just a group. The movie and rolling stone for both girls in a narrative to sell newspapers. What was the most heart wrenching about this was a classmate girl was blamed and attacked by certain people for killing Kirsten, obviously she didn’t. Snotty people blamed her publicly and without mercy….. shame on them, you know who you are. Rene was a lovely girl too who suffered not having opened the door for Kirsten because she was young and scared and didn’t know what was going on, or who was at the door. I wouldn’t have either.
What’s worse is how the media played into all of this and have portrayed Kirsten as a girl who deserved this kind of horrific attack, nobody deserves to be tricked, stalked and stabbed in cold blood at 15 out any age. As I are, I think of all Kirsten has missed and how life changing it was to have your daughter murdered this way and then dragged through the media as a tori spelling played psycho who deserved what she got. Kirsten was just trying to find her way like we all were in a snobby, competitive crappy little town through the Caldecott tunnel. Rest In Peace Kirsten. Bernadette what you did was disgusting period and the only tiny way you can have the smallest amount of self respect would be to publicly come out and admit to the world that you too were an asshole, and Kirsten did not deserve what you did. Shame on you Bernadette what you did was morose, and against your entire religion and you stabbed Kirsten to death. You took the life away from this poor girl and her family. You need to stop defending yourself and own up to the damage you did. Knowing you though you’ll never have the character or the balls to do this and that was the reason you aren’t in whatever popular grip you killed to try to get into.
>> “Whoever wrote this article is not being honest… All of the pictures featured here are photos taken from newspapers, not the authors private collection”
From the author – who also runs this site: The yearbooks ARE in my private collection, as is the huge picture of us in Washington DC. This is all clearly stated in the intro. And the color pictures of the school are photographs I took.
Maybe I made a mistake somewhere in the story (not sure — you’re mostly just saying I was not being honest — what is that about?). I don’t really care about your accusation, but it’s unnecessary — and you’re wrong.
Not true, you said you knew Bernadette and Kirsten both! Was there 1 or 2 girls blamed for the Murder? Also there Was another girl who went out with the football team and accused them all of raping her, not the entire team, but several players and I hear she was ran out as well and dogged by the Students. I think Miramonte was like any School, you have your cliques and picks. I was informed Kirsten was highly popularand a Cheerleader and cheerful, even if she was a bully no right for her to be savagely Murdered. Teen girls are all like Kirsten was described, don’t see how she was worse than any other teen girl around. I heard Bernadette was Snobbish also as well. Probably was, she allowed 2:girls to take the blame. She wasn’t interested in helping outcast kids, cause she wanted to be in, and she was popular to from my standpoint of view.
Not true, I have heard from people at Miramonte in the class of 1986 saying that they don’t want to be found right now due to their experience at Miramonte was not good at all. Well as I said it’s like that in any School, I think high school is a setting where everyone is competing and wanting to race tot he top and cut down anyone who gets in thier way. Did you know Bernadette’s bff? Was she snotty to? I bet she finally became an outcast fro supporting Bernadette. Several Miramonte folks from the class of 1986 complained it was rough and if you weren’t accepted you were ran off and out of there. The girl with the football players heard she was ran out on her ear and laughed out of there to. There was one that wrote in the1986 alumni that she wasn’t desiring to be found cause the 4 years at Miramonte wasn’t the best for her. Maybe she did something to make it bad. School is what you make of it, bullying goes on all the time no reason to Murder over that, Kirsten would of grown out of it by now even if she was a bully. I don’t think she was, just a teen girl who was like the rest in competition. So sad her life was shortened. My School people didn’t accept you, then you were out and ran out, all Schools are like that. I liked School and I wasn’t popular, but I still liked it.
Bernadette was a Snob also. She was just as mean and snooty as the rest and stuck up to. If you were a no body she didn’t roll with you. She kissed the popular girls butt in order to be popular. Don’t let that Sweet Melancholy fool anyone, she was not that unless you were in the group.
I was a year behind those girls, Bernadette was mean to me, she was stuck up also. Kirsten was Snooty as well, so were the Stacys and the other Kirsten’s that ran with them. They were “ stuck up” I didn’t hate them, maybe they were misunderstood. Those girls wouldn’t allow you in their groups in classes, they would exclude you as an earlier article stood. I believe they wouldn’t allow you to read if you were in a group with them, that’s there Nature towards people who they feel superior to. They also laughed at you in the halls when you passed them, Bernadette to and Kirsten, I wasn’t in the (wonderful in crowd) so I didn’t fit in their world. They were good about making you feel like you didn’t belong. Some 86 graduate girls felt ridiculed and belittled by them as well as I did and others. That’s how they rolled. The cheerleaders in the class of 86 and 87 were mostly snobs around there. Esp one 86 girl who thought she was just on top of the world. You know who you are to. To this day I remember those girls well. Never wished Kirsten’s unfortunate death, she may of been misunderstood, but she never talked to me, neither did Bernadette. As for Nancy Kane she was the best in that group cause she was real, and they couldn’t deal with that. Bernadette even tried to point her finger at Joanna as the one who killed Kirsten. Bernadette got to all back to, she deserves to be vilified.
I don’t agree with the Miramonte comments. Kirsten was full of “energy and life”. The school was no more competitive than any other school around anywhere. If you were snubbed at Miramonte, maybe you caused your own reactions. As for Bernadette, I didn’t know her well, but said hello to her a few times in passing at school, and when she came to get the attendance slips. I couldn’t tell you if she was a snob or not. Most teen girls are snippy, I’m sure you girls who had a bad experience were to, in fact one she was worse than anyone she was a (bully) and when the tables turned on her she couldn’t deal with it and left Miramonte. She don’t remember her incidents, others embarrassed themselves by wanting to be the center of attention. So Miramonte was no worse with snobs than any school. Kirsten she liked everyone, she wasn’t any bully by any means, she was so cute and funny. I want popular, but had friends who were, I didn’t sulk about it, I did sports, not clubs or cheerleading. I was happy enough at school without popularity. So whoever wrote Miramonte was a bad school and everyone cut everyone down, maybe it was you cause you weren’t socially accepted, and probably didn’t make the best choices, or embarrassed yourself wanting the attention and. Asking a butt of yourself getting it. Growing up there for me was different, I got along with people, and didn’t try so hard being popular. Abe that was your downfall.
Also people don’t want to be around someone who makes a butt out of themselves and acts like an idiot, it’s to embarrassing. Or someone who stares at you constantly, you got a problem doing that. Kirsten I’ll admit she wasn’t in favor with stupid acting people and had zero tolerance for them, (as did I). Kirsten wasn’t like whoever (Not True) above article said she had to be snobby at the School there. Not true, analyzes yourself if they were snobs to you, probably embarrassed yourself by trying to hard to be accepted, or you were a troublemaker and a bully yourself. As for Bernadette, don’t you think she paid for it, she can’t show her face in fear of someone bringing up her past, it will always be there forever, so she got caught, and got hers I case you think she didn’t. She may have tried to point the blame towards Nancy and Joanna but it backfired on her, Joanna comes to Reunions, as Bernadette can’t cause it will never ever be forgotten. Bernadette is hated to all over so she has answered for it. You may think Bernadette is happy and living life, glad you think so, I would hate to have to always live in fear, of fear of running into someone from my past, or, someone who knows about my past. If someone from Orinda ran into her, especially one of Kirsten’s friends, they would probably spit at her. I wouldn’t doubt it cause that’s how much she is hated in Orinda.
Bernadette/Jeanette has paid her dues. Why can’t people leave this case alone. It was all over popularity, and fitting in. The case is ancient history so why is it constantly being rehashed over and over. The Costas family is no longer mad and ‘moved on’ so why can’t you? So please stop drudging up the past and move on with your lives please. To the fellow classmates of 1986 Miramonte, so sorry if your World crumbled cause it wasn’t meant to be that way, but you got to know that it was t any picnic for Bernadette as well, and if she could set time back and do all over, she would of left the situation with Kirsten alone to start with. God would want you to forgive, Kirsten would as well. As for the girls who got blamed, so sorry if your lives were miserable at the time, but remember Bernadette was scared herself and did t know what to do, she didn’t aim for all that to come down. Bernadette is no more and she doesn’t exist anymore, so why keep bringing up the past, my goodness look at the times the World is in now. 86ers you want to forgive that’s up to you, it would be nice if something could be worked out and you all could go back to the wya things were and not are.
No more Bernadette has a point. It is done and over and over 3 decades. It’s time to move on and stop rehashing alll this. We are no longer in the 80 s and never will be again. We lived it and lived through it, so it’s time to move on. Was Kirsten a smart aleck , don’t know but tell me a teen girl who isn’t! Even Bernadette was to I bet. Did Kirsten deserve to die over it. Absolutely not. To bad she did cause I’m sure she would of grown out of her ways and be a positive influence in someone’s life today even. If Mrs. Cistss forgave Bernadette then great. I’m sure she don’t really like Bernadette, and she wouldn’t go out to dinner with her, or have her over for dinner or go places with her, and welcome her with open arms. She probably just released her anger towards her so she could move on.
Kirsten is better looking than bernadette, because Kirsten facial features are in proportion with her face.. bernadette is not
Mandy, No sense talking about it now, it’s done and over with. We all moved on, every time we rehash this, it just brings up the past to that very day. Orinda folks and former Students who knew Kirsten are not into Morbid fascinations. Kirsten’s friends aren’t either (not one bit). I didn’t know Kirsten but a friend of mine knew her well, she was a (Bubbly) girl and yes she was (self absorbed) what teen girl isn’t. It was a tragedy that affected so many lives at that time. My friend was a friend of hers. She was just into herself more than a “being a bully”. My friend loved her and said she was one that you couldn’t help but love even though she could be cocky.
Anonymous, Kirsten had a bigger heart than people knew about. She cared about people and if she thought she hurt someone’s feelings she would try and talk to them, we all make mistakes. Sometimes she could come off the wrong way, but if someone rubbed her the wrong way, she would let them know. She wasn’t a fan of ( stupidity) by any means at all. She liked mostly everybody. Some she didn’t like, Usually the ones no one else (liked). That’s different, and usually those were the ones that were irritating and annoying. I can understand that part. You got kids in all school people try to duck away from and avoid. Kids no one wants to be around, play alone at recess, those are the kind we avoided. They were ususally strange.
I hear Bernadette don’t want anything to do with anyone from her past at all now. I hear she suffers from depression to. She was outgoing even as a nurse, but now, I hear she don’t really associate with anyone outside of family. I hear she isn’t a nurse any longer and just stays home mostly. Can’t tell you fi she’s still married. She isn’t outgoing like she use to be, I can see why, she has to watch over her head. She’s older also. She won’t be going back to Orinda it’s highly likely she won’t.
Bernadette is hiding out, don’t know about the depression, but she is in hiding and don’t want her location exposed now, not sure if she is married anymore, but she’s not working, she is somewhere out of State close to a family member. One of her relatives I asked how to get ahold of her, and they said she don’t want to be bothered with anyone at all from her past, coworkers, former schoolmates and former friends, outside of family she don’t want to talk to anyone. She won’t tell where she’s at, cause to many people have it out for her cause of her past’. She doesn’t even want any former BFFs knowing her location anymore. I don’t think she suffers from depression, but she is wanting to isolate from the World. She couldn’t careless about Orinda to start with let alone go back there. If she does go back there it’s only to see her family who is still there, and she won’t leave The Whole time she’s there or contact a soul. She hasn’t been there in awhile that I know of. She knows how people still feel about her, she also knows she can’t escape the feelings they have or ever change them even in many years to come forth. Of course it’s done and over with, and people aren’t forgiving and never let you forget anything you did, she made a enormous mistake, that can’t change, but she does regret it and as for her and the Costas family making Peace, can’t even tell you how much truth is in that, but I’m sure she reached out and owned her part, but nothing she can do to change what the outcome cost them. It’s possible they forgave her and moved on. She just didn’t think at the time and it cost a lot of people lots of problems.
Apparently the owner of the other blogs haven’t gave up, just busy. But it is a very old case and Bernadette is no where to be found,(or cares to be)by other than family. Her sister at the bank don’t discuss Bernadette, or discloses her whereabouts, she just says Bernadette don’t wish to be located by former classmates, friends or co workers, she has a very private life now and wants to be left alone. Yes sex offenders have to let people know they’re registered sex offenders true, but Bernadette was a child who murdered another child in the (courts eyes) I agree she should have to let people know what she did, but Court system is the one to blame for that. Kirsten from what I heard was arrogant and self absorbed, but no bully, just a typical teen girl who didn’t deserve to die even if she was a bully. Just some girls on interviews said she was just self absorbed but no bully. Some girls said she was mean to people, we all have opinions, but I’m sure she was smart alecky at times, what teen girl isn’t, even Bernadette was I bet as well. 99.7 percent of teen girls are Smart alecks.
Every Murdered person was once someone’s child, parent, sibling or spouse. So think before you get that angry cause there is no turning back from it. Others suffer more cause they experience the loss. I dealt with it so I know. My Son was Murders in a drug deal gone wrong.
Those girls had a clique. They were snooty and cocky but not mean. They just had their own group of girls. Bernadette was snotty to. So was PC, DM, LP and Kirsten. Bernadette was in with them to so was Jill. AKA Berns BFF named used in movie. But Kirsten didn’t deserve to die, some of those girls changed and are more sensitive. I seen a few of them out and about. Some still get together. Kirsten would of changed to overtime. She was young and like any teen finding her way around. There were girls she didn’t like, either she liked you or she didn’t, no in between. She didn’t like Nancy and a few others. She let it be known. I didn’t know Kirsten that well, talked to her a few times in passing but we didn’t know each other. Her one friend in the group changed, she now fights for women’s right. She’s grown up a lot and isn’t the same teen girl she use to be. She was snooty to or maybe just misunderstood. Maybe they were all misunderstood.
Don’t matter, been what 37 years. The case is extremely old now. None of those Orinda kids are even around from that time frame, as some of them are dead. How is obsessing over this going to solve the problem? It won’t bring Kirsten back. Lots of her classmates are out of State and moved on, maybe you all should as well, Bernadette isn’t even around, leave her alone, the past is gone it’s not coming back ever. Don’t matter if Kirsten was a bully or the meanest girl ever, you haters on her leave her alone and let her Rest In Peace. You’re no better than Bernadette haters as well. I think it’s time to move forward and put this whole horrible deal behind you cause life is way to short. Bernadette may not of paid her dues in the Justice system, she’s paid for it online with her haters harassing her and outing her constantly, and her hometown community hated her and still does. Not to mention all over the world. You got back at her more than enough, it’s best to leave her alone on other sites. The Costas family is doing well and went on with life.